Broken
by ZeroPlan
Summary: Piper Chapman, the young socialite, found her world turned upside down at Litchfield Island. Her after party suddenly consisted of a whole new world of superheroes. She must choose between the safe, comfortable life she used to lead, or the new, dangerous path with her fellow 'gifted' ones. (AU/Vauseman)
1. Chapter 1

**Note to readers: **This idea just hit me, and I'm putting it into words. I'm not sure how far this will go though.

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><p><strong>Chapter 1<strong>

Those eyes. The bluest shade of blue Alex Vause had ever seen.

Occupying a table in the far corner, Alex's attention was on the slender, young woman at the counter. She took in every detail. Every movement of her body. Every intake of a breath.

_Piper Chapman. _

Twenty-two years old. 172 cm. Blonde. Smith graduate. A wealthy family. A privileged life—a 'something' Alex never knew. Fascinated by the sight of deep blue eyes reflected on the mirror behind the bar, Alex watched her target as she enjoyed her cup of coffee. She liked her caffeine at midnight. It kept her on high alert. It suited her job. After all, she was an errand girl. Whatever _they_ would like to call it, it had made her feel useful—important at times. And that was all she had wished for, being somewhat visible.

_So blue…_ Alex pondered. Then she flinched the moment the blue gaze traveled in short, snappy flickers, and halted at the reflection of Alex's own green pools. It all happened in the mirror. Fleeting and surreal. After a moment, Alex had to force her gaze down at the coffee cup in her hands instead, but immediately felt stupid at her action.

_What… the hell are you doing? Pull yourself together! _

Alex silently cursed. She had never been the one to shy away. She was the predator—the spider, and they were all just flies. Taking in a deep breath, she lazily ran her hand through the thick mane of her raven hair, and looked up. She stared into the mirror again, meeting the expectant, curious eyes. But she froze. She failed again. She would usually know what the looks meant, but her mind was acting funny tonight. It was all a blurry, crazy mix of weird excitements, untamed curiosities and primal needs. Alex knew just how much trouble she was in when they weren't even touching. They were simply gazing at each other.

It was the night both Alex and Piper would never forget—how they first met.

* * *

><p>Piper was vomiting green stuff out of her hot, burning throat. She couldn't tell what it was, but she knew that it was bad.<p>

"Piper, honey, are you all right?"

Piper glanced up from the toilet bowl, breathing heavily. Her face was gaunt from months of sleepless nights. There were dark rings around her usually vibrant, blue eyes. Her body felt burnt, her stomach ached. She couldn't tell if those were sweats or tears running down her face. Her entire arms trembled from the harsh grips on the white ceramic. Her knees pained from an hour of kneeling on the cold, tiled floor. "Yeah, just… just gimme a minute."

Larry looked worried, his hand rested on the wooden door. "Are you sure? Do you want me to call an ambulance—"

"_No!_" Piper shrieked, but immediately lowered her voice, knowing how alarming it had sounded to her boyfriend. "N—no. No, I'm fine. Don't call an ambulance. Just—" She paused for a breath. "… just don't call anyone." Her body was weak. Her head was heavy. She sank to the bathroom floor, hugging her knees to her chest. What happened tonight was a just nightmare and nothing more.

_Nothing_.

But it was a nightmare that had started five years ago. It had started as soon as the mysterious, dark-haired stranger walked into her life, and it had seemed to know no end. Hungry. Crazy. Relentless. After four years of repression, which had only grown weaker and more desperate each time _it_ happened, tonight had just proven that there was no point of return. None.

Hugging herself tighter, Piper whispered to herself, "…fine… I'll be fine…"

_No… God, I need help…_

* * *

><p>A month later Piper found herself on the cryptic island. It took only a month for her world to chatter—for everything she had ever known to become one big lie. What surprised her the most, however, was that her future father-in-law had suspected and expected it all along. Howard Bloom was <em>the<em> help she needed. He knew what it was. He was one of them.

Standing by the pier, Piper was wearing a beige trench coat, a wooly, black dress underneath. Her shoulder-length blonde hair danced in the fierce wind. She looked a little pale, nervous and scared. Both her hands snuck in the coat's pockets. She bit her bottom lip as she gazed up at green highlands, the large island she had never known of its existence. It was to become her new home. It was supposed to be where she belonged, or at least it was what she was told. Somewhere secluded. Somewhere hidden away from the rest of the world.

_That's right._ Piper thought bitterly. No more extravagant parties. No more luncheons with the privileged blondes of her class. Now she was stuck on a godforsaken island. Green of nature. In the middle of nowhere. She was sure that her friends would forget to ring her up in two-week time, and she just didn't want to imagine what life was waiting for her after she was done with this 'safe place'. Her pessimism said months or years before she could pull herself together.

Larry sighed. "Come now." His words pulled her out of her thoughts.

His arms around her, Piper had never felt safer before in her entire life. Not even with her parents around. Not with her brother cooking for her. Not with their reassuring words. She had never felt so safe with anyone but Larry Bloom. They had made a promise, a silent promise that they would carry on and cherish each other to the end.

They both stood by the pier. Larry, a dark-haired man in his early thirties, glanced back at the ferryboat behind them. He was of average height. Not too short, but not too tall either. Straight, big nose. Thin lips. Dark, doe-eyed. His hands were warm and reassuring, the hands that had guided Piper through her insecurities and fears.

Larry squeezed Piper's hands as he looked straight into her eyes. If Piper's life had been anything but lies, he was the only truth she had ever known. "My father will take good care of you. You have nothing to be afraid of. He's like—I think he's like God around here." He heartily laughed, trying to ease the heavy silence. "Well, no, I don't really know. I'd never heard of this island until a month ago. Dad doesn't usually tell me things. Well, there's a reason for that, right? Well… uh, b—but I'm sure… I'm sure that he will take good care of you. You're going to make a lot of new friends here. People like you."

Piper frowned. "People like me? What?"

Larry paused. "Whoa. No, that's not what I meant—"

"No. No, say it. What do you mean by that? People like me? What is that?"

Larry gently took her hands and held them close to his heart. "I'm sorry. I picked the wrong words, I guess. Look, it's your first day here, and _away_ from me. So please let's not start a fight now? I can't. I miss you already, Piper. I don't wanna go home with this fight hanging over me for what—weeks or months before they'd allow you to see me again? This is worse than you going to prison."

Piper shook her head. "I'm never going to prison. I'm not like that kind of person."

Larry furiously nodded. "Yes. Yes, that's what I meant. But all I'm saying is that… right now, I can't. I don't want to fight. I miss you terribly… Please?"

Larry smiled, and Piper smiled back. She knew that he was right. She couldn't afford to have a fight unresolved between them now. Who knew how long it would be before they could see each other again?

Piper clutched back his hands. "I'll miss you so much."

Their hands locked with each other, the couple looked at the highlands before them. The sky was gray, and they could see nothing else from the pier. It was the strangest place they had ever been. An island not too far away off the east coast, yet felt a world away for both of them. Where were they? Where would it all lead them?

"I'll be waiting for you," Larry mumbled, "Come back, Piper. I'll be waiting… You have to."

Piper tore her gaze from the scenery and turned to him. She studied, memorizing each of his garments. His black, leather gloves. His black beanie. The gray scarf around his neck. His pale skin and strong hands. His dark eyes that meant heaven to her. His reassuring words that she was not entirely lost to this new, strange world—that she still 'belonged' in the old world.

"Chapman… Piper Chapman?" A voice came from behind.

Piper turned and saw a woman with a short, red hair. The woman looked healthy in her early sixties, a smile on her thin lips.

"Yeah, that'd be me," Piper said.

"Mr. Bloom has been expecting you." The red-haired woman then extended her hand. "Jane Ingalls."

Piper shook her hand. "Nice to meet you." Then, she began to follow Ingalls down the pier. She looked over her shoulder and found that Larry had been ushered back to the ferryboat. They blew goodbye kisses and already waited with heavy hearts when they could see each other again.

* * *

><p>The two-lane road curved along the endless, rocky shores. The van took Piper deeper into the private island. The trees were large and ancient, and the fog was thick. They couldn't see further than ten meters ahead of them. It felt like a different world altogether, and only minutes here Piper was already scared that she would be forgotten on the outside world.<p>

Ingalls stayed quiet for most of the ride, but the younger woman, Lorna Morello, the dark-haired, beautiful driver, explained a few things about the island. The ferry left only once a day at precisely ten in the morning. Residents were free to leave on any day they choose. However, newbies must wait until their probation period ended before they were granted such freedom. Three phone calls were allowed each day. They would have three meals at precisely 8 a.m., noon, and 6 p.m. There was a public bath on each floor (of the 3-stories building), and a roommate would be assigned.

All the information, however, suffocated Piper, and she turned to look away to the scenery outside instead. "Are you… like me? Or do you just work here?" Piper asked.

"We're all gifted here." Ingalls softly patted the young woman's shoulder.

Piper put up a polite smile. '_Gifted_' was a nice way to call it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

The huge, three-story mansion came into view as the van reached the end of the road. It appeared to locate in the middle of the island, views of highlands to the north and the ocean view to the south. Piper exited the vehicle and got her black suitcase with her. She didn't bring much. She had her whole life out there, and she would do anything in her power to make the stay here as short as possible.

* * *

><p>"Sit." The word came soft, but cold.<p>

Gulping, Piper sat down on the chair as instructed.

Across the large, oaken desk was her future father-in-law, Howard Bloom. She had been with Larry for three years, but for some reason his father never warmed up to her. Howard had always seemed distant—restrained. They never talked much, never holding a conversation longer than five minutes. He never wanted to get to know her, and she never tried to oppose his stance. Their mutual understanding was to stay away from each other. Yes, it did come across her mind. It did nag her as to why he was behaving that way. She had always thought that she was the wild type he never wanted for his son. She had thought many things, but her having _gifted_ _abilities_ was never one of them. She would never in a million years expect Howard to know of the existence of superpowers, let alone holding a secret place for people like her.

_Surprised? After all these years?_ Piper paused as the past caught up with her. She remembered that night four years ago, when she had thought that she had found the love of her life—when she had thought that her life could not have been any more perfect than that. But it had disappeared. It had vanished in just a matter of moment. She had been proven wrong, and it had only gotten worse from there. Larry was probably the only good thing that had happened to her in recent years.

"Did you know?" Piper asked. "Did you know that I have this… strange thing?"

Howard was a small man. He didn't possesses any threatening features, but as he sat in this office, in a mansion on a mysterious island off the east coast, he seemed to hold many threatening secrets that Piper didn't want to know. He leaned back in his chair, his hands clasped together across his stomach. He was in a wooly, crimson sweater and a pair of gray slacks. "It's not _strange_. It's natural. You were born with it. You are here to get to know your powers better, so that you can channel and control them, and not accidentally hurt other people. Everyone here has gone through the same pains and problems as you have. You will be safe here."

Still, Piper wouldn't let go. She frowned as she studied him. "How long have you known?"

Howard paused for a moment. "About you? Well, my first suspicion came when we were on the cruise two years ago."

Piper stopped at the mention of the trip. She had tried to bury the memories of those horrified moments. She had never discussed or mentioned it with anyone, but here it was, her future father-in-law was digging up the subject out of the blue as if he had known for a long time.

"The ship would have sunken, and there would be hundreds of losses that night. But I sensed it. A presence. A powerful one." Howard adjusted his glasses. "I've been around long enough, but I don't assume things. So I wasn't going to spy on you. You may say that I have a hunch, and usually I am right most of the times."

Piper jadedly nodded as the memories of that night returned. The ship had hit some rocks. She recalled the panicked faces, the screams and the horror in their eyes. She remembered how extremely exhausted she had felt as if her whole body had been torn apart again and again. After returning home from the trip, she had gone into a six-day deep sleep without waking up even for a sip of water. She had wakened again to find herself in a hospital. It had appeared that Larry had admitted her into the hospital out of fear for her life. He still had no idea what had happened then, and she hadn't planned to tell him of the incident yet. She was afraid that he might be scared of her—or what her powers could do.

"Yeah… so I moved the fucking ship. I didn't even know how I did it. I still don't, but I'm going to get it here, right? This has to count, being here… for how long… I… I can't… What is this place?"

Howard leaned over the desk, a curiosity sparked in his eyes. "I am truly curious what had driven you to move a whole ship. It must be something."

_A survival instinct? _

_Or, a deadly promise she once made to herself that she would stay alive for the faithful moment to come no matter how long it would take?_ Piper looked away for a second, her cold hands on her stiffened knees. She was remembering too much. She was feeling too much. Sometimes it felt as though a sweet revenge was all she lived for.

"You will learn to control your powers, Piper. I promise that you wouldn't lose it and hurt anyone again." Howard cleared his throat, leaning back into his comfy chair. "I won't let you hurt my son."

Piper's thoughts ceased at his last words. Her head jerked up, and she stared at him, saddened. No, she would never hurt Larry.

* * *

><p>"Your bed is on the right. I just had the maid clean up."<p>

The room gave a cozy feel with lacquered wooden floor and two identical sets of wood furniture. Warm rays of sunlight came through the twin windows, separating the room in half. Each side offered a single bed, a bed desk, a working station and a closet.

Piper studied her roommate a bit. She was somewhat relieved that Polly Harper, a brunette, young lady, seemed harmless and polite. She was just normal. 'Normal' was what Piper needed now. They might even hit it off at some party on the mainland even. "Thanks," she said, and put the suitcase on the bed.

Polly pulled the curtains open wider, letting more light into the room. "It's good that you came in today, Piper. I can still show you around a bit. I'll be heading back home tomorrow, and you'll be stuck here alone for two weeks or something."

Piper unpacked her suitcase. "You can go home…? How long does it usually take for a resident to get the permission to leave?" she asked, keeping her voice steady.

Polly sank comfortably on her own bed, a tablet in her hands. "My power is prehensile hair. It can grow really long and do some stuff, but I don't use it that much. I hate it when it drags on the floor. Ew." She made a face. "Well, given my background and excellent family supports, I've been pretty harmless towards others, so I was allowed to go home after the first few weeks here. I can't say the same about the others."

Piper silently nodded. "Then why are you still here?"

Polly grinned. "There are a lot of frustrated, scared and helpless people here. Many of them were disowned by their parents. They don't have jobs or didn't even finish school. Mr. Bloom certainly needs all the help he can get, and I'm here to help. What about you? What's your talent?"

_Talent._ Piper chuckled at the choice of word. "I… I, uh… I move things."

Polly straightened up, lowering her tablet. "Telekinesis?"

"I think so," Piper replied. She spread out her clothes on the bed, trying to determine each wrinkle on the fabrics. Her mother wouldn't approve any of it, and the thought gave her headache even if the woman wasn't here. When silence prolonged, she turned and looked at her roommate.

Polly was wide-eyed, her mouth gaping in shock. She was almost hugging her poor tablet. "Have you ever hurt someone with your powers?"

Piper immediately looked down and focused on the items laid out on the bed. "It saved my life. Four years ago, it saved me…" _It saved me from a really horrible, evil person._ "Then it saved hundreds on the cruise ship." She took a deep breath before she added, "But it threw my brother out of the car when we had a fight just a month ago. I had absolutely no control over it. It was just… a small disagreement."

It was a heated argument. Although Cal was usually calm, Piper was a different story. She was proper or volcanic the next moment. Ever since her powers were awakened, her temperaments seemed to have changed as well. Unfortunately, she hadn't been feeling well for weeks prior. She hadn't been able to get in touch with her powers when the drive happened. When the fight started, she had only felt the powers building up within her, but had no control over it. What happened was the deepest regret in her entire life. She wouldn't know what to do if Cal died that day. It was the reason she willingly submitted herself to this 'special' island.

"I'm gonna sleep with Jessica tonight. Don't take this personally, Piper, but that sounds absolutely insane. I can't believe that they assigned you here." Polly groaned.

Piper began to fidget in her pose. "I understand. I'll ask them to move me, if you want me to—"

"You see that old building right there?" Polly moved towards the window, pointing out.

Piper squinted. Behind the thick woods, she could see the roof of another building. It looked much older and uncared for. Its size was twice as large as this mansion. "What is that? Another dorm?"

"Yep, the South Mansion. We're in the North, the newer one, the safe place with harmless superpowers. I think you belong to the South, but considering your boyfriend…" Polly sat back down on her bed, concentrating on her tablet again. "You can have my room."

Piper grew uneasy. "Hey, I—I won't hurt you—"

"They all say the same thing." Polly even looked understanding as she sighed. "I am one of the easiest members to be able to leave the island, so I think that's why they assigned you with me. Well, you seem like a really nice girl, Piper. Learn your craft, and get out of here."

Nodding, Piper resumed her unpacking. She just hoped that it was as easy as it sounded.

* * *

><p>The first dinner at Litchfield Island came at precisely six o'clock. Inside the large cafeteria, Piper was seated next to Polly, who had just introduced her to Jessica Wedge and her gang. The four blondes occupied the opposite side of the long, wooden dining table. They were looking at Piper up and down, judging her with curious smiles and whispers.<p>

A cream-smeared fork in one hand, Jessica glanced sideway at one of the girls. "What do you girls think?"

"Telekinesis is bad." The second blonde spoke.

"Dangerous and unpredictable, wouldn't you say?"

The fourth blonde shook her head. "She should be in the South. Why isn't she in the ghetto?"

Piper sat quietly, letting the four blondes do all the talking. Polly glanced at her a bit.

"She's going to be Mrs. Bloom soon, just so you know," Polly said over meal.

"_Ahhhh_." Jessica raised her brows in mockery.

"Ah." Piper put up a smile in return. Jessica was a very pretty woman, with nice smiles and great figure. But Piper just really, really didn't like her all that much. There was just something about this bitch.

"Wait. Larry Bloom, right?" Jessica hummed. "You must be something special. Because Howard, AKA _the_ Bloom, has always been clear that he doesn't want a 'gifted' girl for his son. I always love it when he uses that word, 'gifted'. He couldn't even make it sound sincere. And to think that he's one of us, taking care of this place. He's quite a conflicted man, isn't he?"

Piper paused at the information. She had no knowledge of this isolated island before, or what Howard had been doing behind his lawyer façade. Howard and she never brawled, not even a bit, but there was always that strange distance—the invisible wall between them. Maybe it was just what Howard had admitted earlier today that he had suspected her all along. Howard feared for his son.

_God, Larry…_

Piper put down her fork, her appetite completely lost at the moment. The mere thought of him tore her heart. It hadn't even been a day since they parted, but it already felt unbearable to her. She wanted to call him now. She needed to hear that they would be ok after all of this—that he would not waver and cower to his father's will.

"_Conflicted_ is all of us, don't you think?"

Piper, Polly and the blonde gang looked up at the interruption. A strawberry-blonde woman in her early thirties approached them with a tray of food in her hands. She sat down next to Piper, smirking with a toothpick between her teeth. She was rather small, but with a fiery, lion hair. Her eyes were round with a dark shade of hazel.

"Hello." Piper automatically responded.

"Hey, beautiful. Nicky Nichols." The woman said, and then spat out the toothpick to the side of her own tray. The action earned an immediate turning away from the blonde gang.

Piper had to move away a bit since Nicky sat down so close to her that their arms were brushing. "Piper Chapman… I'm engaged."

Nicky laughed, slapping the table. "Yeah, I can see that three fucking miles away. But he isn't here, is he? You fancy anyone tonight?"

Piper moved an inch away from the weird, lion-hair woman. "I'm here to learn to channel my powers, not to find a date or casual one-night stand," she said, trying to keep her voice steady.

"Yeah, I got my powers just fine. I move fast. I move anything fast. My fingers are fast, too. You fancy?"

"She teleports. She doesn't fuck _fast_," Polly explained to Piper, "People here tend to exaggerate their powers."

Nicky chuckled. "So you've heard about me, or are you interested, Molly?"

"It's Polly," Polly corrected, her face reddened as she glared at Nicky. "You can't sit with us, Nichols."

"Why not? Is this high school?"

Piper inwardly groaned. She now understood why the blonde gang had already evacuated their trays to the other line of tables. She took in a breath. She just couldn't believe this was happening to her on the first day. "Nichols, I am… not interested in women," she said with a calm voice, trying her best to reason with this mad woman.

"Sure, girl." Nicky began to devour her food. After a while, she looked up, wiping the bread crumbs off her lips, and grinned. "Everyone is dangerous here. Don't let them convince you otherwise."

"Oh, thanks for telling me." Piper kept her gaze elsewhere, while trying to decide if she should move to another table. Thankfully, Polly had stayed by her side, and they both exchanged weary glances at each other.

"That Wedge shit, she got ice powers. She can freeze people to death. Not kidding. So don't give in to _this_ or _that_ mansion shit. It's all about whether your parents can pay. The ones in the South? They're from poor families. Some of them never leave this island again because they don't know how to survive out there." Nicky chuckled. "Like I said, everyone is dangerous here. Watch your back."

When Nicky gathered her tray and left the table, Piper turned to Polly for further explanation.

Polly meekly shrugged. "Well, Nichols is kinda right. But those poor—umm, I mean, less fortunate people can be very dangerous, because they have nothing to lose! They constantly fight one another, and sometimes it gets serious and fatal. You really don't want to see what it's like in that dorm. You wouldn't be able to sleep there even for a night. It's just not a place for people like us." She then glanced at Nicky, who was already walking out of the cafeteria. "Her mother is some rich guy's girlfriend, and that's why she can afford to be here with us. But she likes to hang out with those delinquents in the South though."

"If Nichols can go there, can they come here too?" Piper asked.

Polly took a sip of her drink. "There's no rules preventing us from visiting each other, but it doesn't happen often. Nichols is one of a few examples. She has no friends here, and her girlfriend lives in the South."

Speaking of loved ones, Piper stood up from the table. "I need to make a phone call."

* * *

><p>Piper lied down the bed, her hair still wet from the shower. It was only ten o'clock, and her eyes were wide awake. She was in her blue, long-sleeve pajamas. She made a phone call to Larry after dinner, and they talked for twenty minutes. She told him about the people she had met today, reassuring him that she was in a safe place. However, she neglected to tell him about what his father said. She wasn't sure how he would react, and the fact that she had no idea how long it would be until she was allowed to go home, she didn't want to risk complicating things between them.<p>

She glanced at the empty bed next to her. Polly wasn't kidding. The brunette was spending the night at Jessica's room. Piper didn't blame her though. Throwing a brother out of a car would have scared anyone, even Piper herself. Luckily, Cal was a big, strong man, and he landed in a swamp, so he wasn't badly hurt. It touched Piper so deeply that while he was surprised, of course, he wasn't scared of her at all, unlike her parents. He was understanding and even had a pained look in his eyes when she confessed to him that she had been living these past four years in paranoia, having to hide her powers from everyone. Cal was the best thing that happened in her life.

_Oh, wait, second best. Larry should be the first on the list._ Piper chuckled at her slip. Then a darker thought crept in as the list of bad things in her life grew longer and longer, outdoing the happy thoughts. The worst thing that had ever happened in her life had to be her unwanted superpowers. It landed her here, locked her away from the outside world and loved ones like a prisoner. It was all because of her gifts—

_No, it was all because of her…_

It had been the first time in four years that Piper let herself lost in the thought of that woman. That vile woman who came into her life, uninvited—who did this to her.

_She did this to me… She's the whole fucking reason I'm here._

Piper swore that if she ever met her again, she'd kill her with her powers. A payback would be so sweet.

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks<strong> for comments/follows. I promise Alex will appear soon.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Things went rather smoothly for the next two weeks for Piper, and to have the room all to herself to start off with made the time here on Litchfield Island a little more bearable than she had previously thought.

Stretching her legs over the mat, Piper sulked at the thought of her roommate returning tomorrow. She was in a yoga class with a few dozen other residents. Instructor Yoga Jones was in her late forties, skinny, with short, silver hair, and a pair of kind eyes.

The day had progressed ordinarily. They would have yoga, or meditation sessions in the morning, and then 'powers' trainings after lunch. It was a course for residents to learn how to channel their powers. Residents who had nonviolent powers would be grouped together, separated from dangerous ones. The training would start at 2:30 P.M. So far, so good. Piper surprised herself that she had done quite well in trainings, finding and feeling her powers much easier now. She was much more in tune with herself, or perhaps she just felt safer that there were others just like her here.

When Yoga Jones dismissed the class, Piper rolled up her mat just like everyone else.

"Hey, doing anything tonight?"

Piper looked up at Nicky. "Nothing. It's not like I can leave the island even if I wanted to."

"Come on. You don't want to leave." Nicky winked, and Piper just smiled.

Nicky had kept her company while Polly was gone. They always had meals together. The Fantastic Four, AKA Jessica Wedge gang, would not sit with Piper again after that first day with Nicky, but she had no objections about it. She was rather happy that the blondes left her alone. But what Nicky did at night, Piper had never been a part of it. She just assumed that Nicky frequented the South a lot.

"There's a game tonight. They hold it every other week, trying to be discreet and all."

"A game? What kind of game?" Keeping her voice low, Piper watched as other residents began to leave the room. She had always been discreet, a proper girl her father always wanted her to be.

"It's like a fight club thing. People need something, but they can't always afford it. So a pair will fight it out. The winner can ask for a favor, or something similar, and the loser will have to oblige to it."

Piper raised her brows. "Fight with what? Our powers? But that's not allowed outside of class."

Nicky rolled her eyes. "Have you been listening at all?"

"Won't that be dangerous, considering that we can actually—accidentally kill each other with our powers?"

"Oh, yes, it can get pretty rough, and that's why we only allow a pair of fighters at each game. We can't afford to kill too many of us." Nicky darkly chuckled. "Hey, don't worry. Usually when someone knows that they will lose, they will just surrender. Very few actually put their lives at stake."

Piper nodded. "You can teleport. That's a tricky power. Have you ever fought?"

"_Tricky_." Nicky sounded amused.

"Yeah, rapid, counter attacks. It'll be useful."

Nicky's eyes went wide. "Well, thank you, teacher. I'll keep that in mind. Seriously, I've never thought of that. I never fought in the ring before. It's just not my thing, but I like to watch."

"Like betting who will win?" Piper stood up, holding the rolled up mat in her arm. "That, I think, is the whole point of it, to see if you're right or not, but without getting yourself hurt. Maybe only your purse."

Nicky got up and followed her out of the room. "So is it a date?"

Piper laughed, pushing the door open for both of them. "I thought you already have a girlfriend."

They strode through the long, busy corridor. Lunch would be in an hour.

Nicky mildly shrugged, her voice sounding a little sad when she said, "She's still hung up over that guy, Christopher. Always has. Always will be."

Piper couldn't have cared less. "Chris? Who?"

"The rich guy in the room opposite to yours. Tall. Handsome. Broad shoulderes. How can you not notice him?" Nicky actually sounded frustrated and upset. "Have you seen him around? Has he been talking and manipulating Morello? I think he's up to something." She growled. "He only sees her as a plaything. I told her that he'd never get serious with her, but she wouldn't listen."

Nicky sounded desperate for once, and Piper decided to rage through her memories for bits of Christopher. She hadn't paid attention to many people, or much of the surroundings. Even the outside world was slowly lost to her now. She daily made two phone calls to Larry, and one to her family member, but it all had quickly become just that, a routine. It had been only two weeks, and yet she felt she was already a world away from them. They would never understand what it felt like to be here. They would never understand what it felt like to have all these unique, special powers in their hands, and still hated every single moment of it. That hurt. That pain. Only the people here would understand it.

"I've met Christopher twice. He seemed proper," Piper finally said. "He seemed kind. He offered me a box of orange juice when I tried to find something to eat at night. It was my second night here, and I wasn't expecting that there wouldn't be any local convenient stores on the island."

Nicky grumbled. "He better treats her nice, or else I—"

"I'd like to go to the game tonight. It should be fun." Piper smiled at Nicky. At best, she wanted to ease that anger in Nicky's heart. Whatever Christopher and Lorna were now, what mattered was to get Nicky out of this messy triangle.

"So it's a date." Nicky grinned.

* * *

><p>After dinner, Piper followed Nicky out of the mansion. She was in a green sweater and a pair of khakis. They were being discreet, or Piper asked Nicky to be. She just didn't want Jessica or anyone to make a big deal out of it. As far as she knew, the general opinion of the North residents was to stay clear from the dangerous South. They would offer helps when they were asked. Pitying the poor was part of the job, but the two tribes were never really brothers and sisters. Even when they were stuck on an island together, shunned and disgusted from the outside world, they were still divided amongst themselves.<p>

Piper and Nicky walked across the big yard that separated the North and the South. The Study building, where yoga and other light sessions were held, was on the east, while the Zone, a much larger building for powers trainings, located on the west. Tonight would be the first time Piper would get to see the South Mansion. She could hear noises already, shouts and music growing louder as she neared the building. It excited and scared her at the same time. At least it gave a sign of life on this isolated island, exactly what she needed at the moment.

The South was much bigger than Piper had originally thought. It was also a three-story building but with much wider front, accommodating many more rooms than the North. It was already nine o'clock, and most of the North residents would have retired to their rooms, or kept their quiet activities within the safe walls of the mansion. But it was a totally different scene with the South. Many residents were hanging out by the garden near its east wing. Some were playing basketball, the others holding a soccer match. It was busy and crowded that nobody paid attention as Nicky and Piper arrived.

"Stay close to me. Don't get lost. They don't like newts here, especially one from the North," Nicky said.

"_Newts_?" Piper suddenly felt unsure, glancing around. "Well, thanks for telling me now. Should I go back?"

Nicky laughed. "Where's the fun in that? Let's go get some drink."

Piper groaned. Maybe it was a really bad idea to follow Nicky here. She could get into troubles and Howard would frown upon her. He might take the opportunity to tell Larry of her misbehaviors and there would soon be trouble in their paradise. Before her mind would get more of the funny ideas, a red cup was shoved into her hand. Piper raised it up to get a better look. A beer was nice. It should calm her a bit.

"Thanks," Piper said. For a short while, they were hanging around the entrance of the mansion. People were passing, chatting and laughing. "Do they party every day? You said they don't have much money."

"You know how some rather spend money on booze than actual food? Molly was right. They aren't your kind of people."

"It's Polly. And you think these people are your kind?" Piper smirked.

Nicky grinned. "Kind of. I'm in the North with you, thanks to my mom's boyfriend's money. But this is where I truly belong. Anyway the game will start soon. Come on."

They pushed their way around the building, heading towards the backyard.

Under a tall, rusty streetlamp, two men were standing, facing each other. They were surrounded by at least a hundred bystanders. Seeing how many people just on the outside of the mansion, Piper mused about the real number of the South residents. It must be overly crowded here, unlike the spacious rooms that were reserved for the better half of the 'gifted' population.

"The shorter, a bit bulky guy, his name is John Bennett. He's a real nice guy. He gets challenged a lot, because he often loses the game," Nicky explained, while tiptoeing to get a better view of the fight ring.

Piper stood languidly, being almost a head taller than most girls there. "Why? He looks quite strong. But can't he refuse to participate if he doesn't want to?"

"That's exactly why they love to challenge him. Bennett is too nice to fight nasty, or too nice to say no. They can get help from him easier than the others. Plus, he has super strength. Pretty useful in petty thefts. Poor man can't really leave the island for long. The police are looking for him, and it's not even his own shits that got him into trouble." Nicky scratched her nose as she droned on and on. "He used to be a cop, you know. Long story."

_Long story. Don't we all have one..._ Piper stared ahead, watching as the fight began.

Bennett dodged his opponent's attacks quite easily for the first ten minutes, but things got intense when the first punch landed fully at his right side of his face, cutting his cheek with a four-inch gash. Blood streamed down his cheek, down to his neck and chest. The cut seemed quite drastic, and Piper squinted to see what the opponent was holding. It wasn't a weapon, but his own blade fingers. She squirmed at the sight.

"That looks nasty," Piper commented. "He could have seriously injured someone with those. It looks like he already has."

Nicky chuckled, softly punching Piper's shoulder. "Get used to it, Chapman. Aren't you quite a perilous one yourself?" She looked at her watch and groaned a bit. "Damn. That woman is late again. How predictable."

Piper decided not to respond to Nicky's comment on her powers. "Who are you waiting for?"

"An old friend of mine… A trouble." Nicky finished her drink, and shook the empty cup at Piper. "Want another one?"

" Sure." Piper followed Nicky into the mansion, heading towards the white, twin tables, where they were serving drinks. The walls, floor and sets of furniture were worn and torn, much older than the ones in the North. It smelled damp and unclean in the hall, too. The windows were murky, and the lights were dimmed. The place was being uncared for. Amazingly, it was another world altogether by just crossing the yard.

"If they found out that you're from the North, they'll make you pay for the drinks," Nicky joked as she handed the second cup to Piper.

Piper took it, smiling. "I'll pay. I feel bad already that I came uninvited."

"Shut up, Nicky. You're scaring your friend away. A newbie?" A low, husky voice came behind Piper, and Piper froze. The cup dropped to the floor, some of the cold drink splashed onto her pants and shoes.

That voice. That unique, soothing voice that Piper would never mistake it for someone else's. That voice that had haunted her for years. The voice she had thought that she would never get to hear it again.

Piper wanted to turn to face her nightmare. This was just a nightmare. She would be brave and just chase it away like she had imagined a thousand times before. But her body failed to move. Her heart beat so fast against her ribs. Her blood boiled. Her mind hazy.

"You're back, and you're late… Again!" Nicky greeted the tall woman in black, who had just walked past Piper, with a bear hug. "Look, Vause, this is Piper Chapman. New and North. Her first night in the South." Nicky grinned as she proudly presented her blonde acquaintance to her dark-haired friend.

Alex Vause. It wasn't a unique name, but it couldn't have been anyone else. Not with that voice. Not with those eyes, and the sickly pale skin.

The same, pale-green gaze Piper still saw in her dreams eventually gazed up, its sole attention stopping on Piper. And it felt right then that her world had stopped. It must be her mind tricking, or someone in this hall possessed such ability to stop time, for Alex had frozen upon seeing her as well. Alex became as still as a statue, and Piper couldn't help but take this opportunity to study her. It'd been four years since they last saw each other, and the wild, mysterious blue streaks had vanished from Alex's raven tresses. The smug smile Piper had seen earlier disappeared too, leaving the porcelain face as cold and ashen as a ghost scared of its own past.

Piper only broke out of her trance when someone yelled at the spilled beer. Then someone else responded by exposing her as a North resident. From the anger in their voices, Piper doubted that they just wanted her to pay for her beer, but something else entirely, which Nicky had failed to mention.

Nicky was quick to act. She slung one arm around Piper's waist. "Hey it's alright. She's with me."

"She isn't Lorna. You both are from the North! You have no business here!" One of the guys shouted from across the hall.

Alex turned to Piper again, lifting her black-rimmed glasses over her head. A habit when she was actually speaking the truth, which wasn't that often since she probably only did it once or twice a day. "Maybe this is a bad time to say hi."

Piper loved that voice, and she hated that she loved it. "No shit," she said, her voice cold.

Screams erupted, and Piper was sure that they weren't hers. Alex was sent flying backwards across the room, crashing through the glass windows and landing hard on the grass outside. Alex rolled unceremoniously into the middle of the fight ring, causing the game to stop and spectators scattered in all directions, yelling.

Bennett bent to get a better view of the crawling woman at his feet. "Vause?" He then smiled in relief, his face was all bloodied. "Welcome back, Vause! I thought that I'd never see you again!"

"Ye...yeah..." Alex tried to speak, but coughed out her lungs instead. The impact had her on all fours, terribly shaken. There were some nasty tears on her black leather jacket as far as she could see. Her left forehead and left forearm were bleeding. "F-" But Alex wasn't allowed a moment to swear. She was once again sent crashing against the lone streetlamp in the backyard, electric bolts flashed for a few, furious seconds before the whole South Mansion sank into sudden blackness. Alex, too, was sunken fast into oblivion.

Screams exploded as people stampeded through the backyard, and in and out of the mansion in panic.

This time Alex didn't even try to get up. Her head was spinning, and the pain on her right shoulder was screaming for murder. She glanced up a bit. _Fuck. My glasses fell off... _Her eyes narrowed in the dark, and she saw that Piper was climbing out through one of the broken windows. The blonde was fiercer than she had ever expected. Over the years, something had changed in Piper. Something that Alex didn't particularly like. Or, someone.

Lying flat on her stomach, Alex was convinced now that Piper truly meant to kill her tonight._ I'm fucked..._

"Jesus, Vause! Are you all right?!" Nicky ran towards Alex, knelt down beside her and grabbed her arms. "Hold on tight!"

Alex paused. She took a moment to think what Nicky had implied. "Oh... no...no, not that—"

"We gotta go! Incoming!"

At Nicky's last word, Alex felt fierce wind and turbulences around her. It was as if she was flying high into the sky and diving low into the ocean floor at a breakneck speed. She had no control over her flailing body, or its direction at all. She couldn't even open her eyes due to vicious velocity, and the pains weren't helping any. The swirling darkness continued for what seemed like forever, and for a moment there she thought that maybe she was already dead, and that's she was spiraling down to hell.

"Thank God! We made it!" Nicky announced, and the enthusiasm in her voice pulled Alex out of the slumber she was in.

Her eyelids heavy, Alex opened her eyes again to see that she was still in the backyard of the South Mansion. But the people were gone, and the whole area was still dark. Still pained, she slowly got up, but didn't get very far before she threw up her dinner. She was sure that it was a combination of both her friend's awesome teleporting moves, and her former lover's major kicks in her ass.

Nicky shook her head, arms across her chest. "You look like shit, Vause. Damn. It must be one hell of a love affair to get such violent reactions from an ex. What the fuck happened?"

"Things—" Alex spat out some blood, and wiped her lips with the back of her hand. "...and stuff..." Shakily, she stood up, but bent forwards a little as pain shot through her ribs. She didn't want to imagine the pain she'd be feeling tomorrow. Joy. "Why are we... why are we still here?"

"I hid you somewhere in the woods for about two hours. You know I can't take you back to the North. They'd kick you out for sure, not to mention Chapman would be there, too. More drama. So I had to wait and made sure that she already left the South before I brought you back here." Nicky patted Alex on the shoulder. "Your old room was already taken, but I'll ask Morello if she can take you in tonight." She looked up at the sky and frowned. "By the way, where's your flying girlfriend?"

"She… she was just here to drop me off." Alex grumbled as she tiredly moved towards the broken windows. Her black boots stepped onto the pieces of broken glass. She needed to find her glasses. "What happened to my stuff?"

"Packed. In my room. You didn't have much..." Nicky followed to stand next to Alex. "Hey, Vause."

Alex gradually looked up, puzzled at the soft tone from Nicky.

"I'm glad you're back."

Alex carefully straightened up. She managed only a small smirk since her face was hurt with cuts and bruises. "Yeah, it's good to be back."


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

It was already dawn, but Piper hadn't had any sleep. She sat on her bed, leaning against the window, gazing out.

After several hours, she had just come down from the high of powers rush. Sometimes it made her feel like she could fly into the sky. Other times like a ton of bricks on her conscience. Last night was something completely different. Never had she intentionally used her powers against other humans, but also with absolute control over it. Unlike the incident with Cal, this time Piper knew what she was doing, she went with it, and she got it right. Perhaps she had underestimated her hate for Alex all along. If hate was the thing to keep her powers in check, then she would gladly use that woman as her practice target.

_Alex_.

Piper frowned, dark circles under her eyes. No, she shouldn't think about her anymore. She had let the thought of that woman swirling around in her mind for much of last night. It had become too much. Her heart was exhausted by her own fire of hate. She had to stop.

Piper sighed, and lied down on the bed. She had just realized how tired she really was. Howard surely wouldn't let this incident go easily. Piper was still a newbie, yet she had already broken the rules; using powers outside of class, damaging Litchfield properties, and harming other resident. So much for trying to be discreet. Whenever she thought that she had her 'good girl' façade intact, the monster in her would awaken, come out of its hiding and ruin everything for her. She wondered what Howard would say to his son, and she already dreaded their next phone call. She wasn't sure how to explain why she suddenly attacked a fellow resident, while needing to keep her past relationship with Alex hidden.

_That lying bitch. That vile piece of—_

Piper's thought ceased at the sound of an object dropping onto the floor. She raised her shoulders to look down, but stopped at the sight of the pair of black-rimmed glasses. She could do nothing but stare at it, not quite sure what had possessed her then to pick them up and took them with her last night.

_Fuck._ Piper groaned and flopped back down on the bed.

* * *

><p>Alex woke up at the sound of distant chatters and loud footsteps. She winced the first moment she opened her eyes. The pain on her body intensified as her mind became clearer. Her head was groggy, the cut on her forehead and arm stinging like a bitch. It hurt just to breathe.<p>

Alex struggled, and eventually sat up. She then remembered where she was; she had spent the night in the lounge. Thanks to Lorna, she at least had a pillow and a blanket. Lorna even let her borrow Christopher's gray pajamas, Lorna's favorite, which she had kept for two years now. The tiny woman helped dress her wounds too. Alex sulked; none of her girlfriends were ever this kind to her, especially not a certain blonde she ran into last night.

_Piper is really here. It was only a matter of time..._ _But she should be safe here._

For some reason, Alex could never stay angry with Piper for too long, no matter what the woman had done. But perhaps last night had gone a little too far even by superheroes standard. Sure, their bodies were naturally stronger than normal humans, but it didn't mean that they could effortlessly endure severe beatings. Alex considered going to the infirmary last night, but her stupid pride stopped her, and she settled on sleeping on one of the couches in the lounge. Besides, she expected to get a call from Healy soon after having returned unannounced, not to mention how messy the whole thing turned out. She'd rather go to his office than let him see her on a hospital bed.

A few people came down to the lounge, and greeted Alex as they passed. She sighed happily. For a moment, it felt like no time had passed. Just like the old day. But she knew it wasn't true. Nothing was the same now.

* * *

><p>Healy looked displeased. His thick brows sat stoically on his grumpy, square face. His blue eyes watched Alex like a hawk. She didn't have to wear glasses to see his absolute contempt for her; she felt it. It was his eternal crusade against the lesbians. His thick arms hugged across his big belly. She believed he had gained quite several pounds during the past eight years of her absence from Litchfield.<p>

Alex paused when she realized how long she had been gone. She visited from time to time, but those days were far and few in between, and she never stayed for more than a few days at a time. Sadly, life outside of Litchfield hadn't taught her anything. She wasn't any better from when she left. She just got worse.

"You're squinting. Where are your glasses?"

"…I lost it."

"During the fight?" When she didn't respond, Healy continued, "It seems that you've lost your edge. The outside world must have done a number on you. 'Alex Vause' lost her glasses?" He darkly laughed.

It took Alex every ounce of willpower to remain silent. Her ego needed to be set aside for now. She needed a place to stay as she was completely broke at the moment. Sometimes she still couldn't believe what she had done to bring herself to this new low. She used to be young, successful and ruthless. But now her girlfriend just dropped her off because she was quickly becoming an extra baggage no one wanted.

Alex stared blankly at her feet. _Maybe I should go for another faction and—_

A knock came at the door, and Healy looked up. "Come in."

* * *

><p>Piper took a deep breath in, and pushed the door open.<p>

Healy was sitting behind his desk, smiling warmly at her, gesturing for her to come in. However Alex didn't acknowledge her presence. The woman just sat on her chair, staring down at her worn, black boots. Alex's hair was a little unkempt, and she looked paler than usual. Piper could see the bones sticking out on the back of her hands as the woman gripped the armrests. Alex was in a white sweater and a pair of black jeans, looking much thinner than when they were still together. Somehow, all the details Piper could see now painted guilt in her heart. She hadn't a better look of Alex last night. She hadn't spared a thought of what had gone on during their four years apart.

Piper sat down next to Alex. "Good morning, Mr. Healy."

"Good morning, Chapman. How are you today? Are you feeling better?"

At Healy's question, Alex moved a little in her chair. Piper turned and caught sight of the nasty cut on the woman's forehead. She then realized how odd the question must have sounded to Alex since she was the one who took the beating.

Piper tore her gaze from the pallid face. "I… I'm fine. Thank you." Worries involuntarily surged in her chest. Alex looked really ill. Piper wondered what other wounds she might have inflicted upon the woman. Were they serious? She had been so angry last night that she only realized now that she hadn't actually held back her powers at all. She grimaced, her hands gripping her knees.

"Mr. Bloom has heard about the incident, but he's in Germany now as we speak, so I am in charge of the situation here. I've seen the damages. The windows. The streetlamp. The South went out of power for almost three hours." Healy focused his attention on Piper, his gaze searching. "I see that you have some difficulties controlling your rage, Chapman."

"No… No, Mr. Healy, I was just—"

Healy leaned over the desk, hands clasped together. "Are you saying that Vause initiated the fight?"

Piper looked dazed for a moment.

"What really happened? You can tell me." Healy dangerously glanced at Alex. "Did she try to provoke you? Did she try to get close? Did she attempt to force—"

"No! No, it wasn't anything like that," Piper countered. She briefly looked at Alex, puzzled that the woman had remained silent at Healy's implications. "I... W—we had a terrible misunderstanding. She mistook me for someone else with the same powers that I have, and I… I just got scared, and I… Yes, I attacked her first, but out of fear. I didn't mean it."

At Piper's confession, Healy sat back, a heavy sigh on his lips. He looked bored as he stared at Alex. But it wasn't just boredom on Healy's part; Piper could see the hate in his eyes. She wondered what really went on between Alex and Litchfield. She was totally surprised to see Alex last night. For a whole year they were together, she never knew that Alex was one of the gifted. Alex had never displayed any supernatural powers in front of her. Alex had rarely ever talked about her past.

Piper glanced at Alex again, and somehow it fucking hurt to see how dull and sick the woman was. Alex had always seemed strong and confident. She had the invincible air about her. Piper had even expected Alex to fight back last night.

_Oh, God… Her powers are passive…_

"I'm writing you both a shot. Chapman, you're grounded. You aren't allowed to visit the South until further notice. Vause, janitorial duties, the Study, third floor, for a month. Starting tomorrow. Understood?"

Piper's eyes widened. "What? But it wasn't her fault. I... ok, I'll pay for the broken windows and everything that—"

"It has nothing to do with the cost, Chapman. It's for your own safety. Stay away from those people. You are not like them," Healy said with a stern expression. "And that's just my welcome gift for Vause. She doesn't seem to have a problem with it."

Alex smiled. "Thank you, sir. Will that be all?"

"Get out of my face." Healy waved at Alex.

Alex obliged. Although she straightened up as she walked out the door, Piper could see the oddities in her movements. She remembered Alex's strides well; nonchalant, fast or lazy. This was not one of them.

Quickly, Piper excused herself and followed Alex out. She wasn't surprised to see Alex had slowed down her pace once she was out of Healy's office, and now had one hand on the wall. She walked up the woman. "Are you hurt?"

Alex looked up, squinting at Piper for a second. "Are you fucking kidding me?" She retracted her hand from the wall and began to walk again, faster this time.

"Why didn't you say anything to him? He punished you for no reasons. This isn't like you at all." Piper followed. "And how come you never mentioned that you are 'gifted' too? You lied again. Everything about us is a lie."

"First of all, nobody's gifted here, Pipes. We're cursed. And I didn't lie. I didn't tell you because you never asked. Now could you please leave me alone? Or are you looking for excuses to beat me up again?" Alex looked annoyed, and perhaps even more annoyed that she couldn't see clearly and couldn't walk fast enough to lose Piper.

Piper's hand shot to her jacket pocket. She had been meaning to return the glasses to Alex. "I kicked your ass because you deserved it _and_ more. I landed in Litchfield because of you. You did this to me. You took me away from my family, my friends, my career and... my… uh, and—"

"You can say 'fiancé'. No hard feelings. We're over. Have been, for a long time." Alex smiled that knowing smile, and it made Piper want to punch that woman again.

_Bad thought. Need more self-control._ More troubles or Piper would land in the South. The Fantastic Four would make sure of that. They already threatened her this morning.

"Is that a long time to you?" However, the question slipped through Piper's lips before she could stop it. _When it feels just like yesterday that you hurt me..._

Both Alex and Piper were taken aback by the sudden question. But Alex was fast to put on a neutral expression again.

"A day without you is a long time for me... Unimaginable, in fact." Alex mumbled. Her voice was husky and soft just like how Piper remembered.

But the awkwardness of the conversation made Piper feel uneasy. This wasn't how she envisioned herself last night to be acting when she would encounter Alex again today. Then the thought of Larry suddenly entered her mind. She stiffened at once, her voice distant. "I gotta go. It's almost lunchtime now, and I got Instructor Red for a private training afterwards. I can't be late. Apparently they feel that it might help me channel my emotions better."

"You got private trainings, and I got public toilets to wash for a whole month. Remind me never to fuck with the privileged. I never learned." Alex walked away, making a right turn at the intersection.

Piper couldn't help it. She took a few strides to follow the woman. "That's because you refused to change, Alex. Don't you dare put this on me."

"Whatever, Pipes. Thanks for the story anyway. Glad that Healy bought it, or he'd probably kick me out already."

Piper paused. "What? You let me lie to Healy to save yourself?" She blinked a few times. "Was that why you kept quiet the whole time you were in there?"

Alex stopped, and turned to face her. "Well, I didn't know which version you were going to go with. I didn't want to raise suspicions. We both, no, I meant, _I_ could get into serious trouble, and I can't afford any of it at the moment. I've got other things to worry about. And, Pipes..., you lied to save yourself. Don't."

Alex walked away, and Piper didn't follow any further. She knew she shouldn't.

* * *

><p>"Your powers represent you. You were born with it. You manifest it. But, ultimately, it is what you are."<p>

Red. The powers training instructor. A 58 years old veteran. She was the great granddaughter of the first Litchfield powers training instructor, Erik Markovic. It ran in the family, and she was proud of it. While Red seemed feisty like her red, spiky hair, there's an air of weathered, but calm soul about her. A totally different air from Piper's mother, chilling and slippery.

Piper was with Red in a smaller gym, while the others were in the regular, bigger gyms. She now understood why they had several smaller gyms around. They were for people like her: the violent ones. And she felt depressed for the first time in two weeks. She was still an outcast even on this island, where she had begun to think she belonged.

"Before class is over. Can we talk about what happened last night?"

Sitting on a mat, Piper looked up, confused. She was in her gray sweatshirt, her head hooded. Her long legs were comfortable in a pair of black yoga pants.

"Tell me what triggered your rage."

"But I already told you."

"Not the Healy version. The real version." Red stared at her. The woman was standing in the corner of the room. She wasn't wearing gym clothes, but a black, pant suit. Piper had been moving a thousand cans for the past three hours, up and down, ever so slowly. She already felt like being interrogated for murder than dealing with her superpowers. "You know that my powers are mind reading."

Piper groaned. "Then why do you bother asking? Just read my thoughts."

"Believe me. I try not to use my powers too much. It can become _too much._ I spent my whole life, trying to block it out. Those were very painful years." Red cleared her throat before she continued. "With you, I sense anger and pain, but I didn't pry. I want to hear it from you. It'll do you good if you speak the truth."

Piper stared back at Red, almost as if challenging the woman to break into her head. "That's the only version I know."

"I cannot help you if you aren't willing to accept help… Ah, so much anger."

"I feel fine," Piper said, trying her best not to think of Alex. She wasn't sure if she did it to protect Alex in case the real version of the story got out, seeing how much Healy hated her, or just that Piper couldn't bear another thought of her. Last night and today had been too much. Just too much.

_Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I forgot to call Larry!_ The thought only aggravated Piper even more. She needed to make a phone call as soon as the class was over. They usually talked in the morning and again before going to bed. She didn't want to imagine what he must be thinking now that their morning phone call was missed.

"You do realize that you almost killed two people in a span of one month and a half. One being your own brother, and the other a stranger. You failed to control your powers, and you might not be lucky next time. Someone might get killed—"

"But I was in control! I had perfect control last night!" Piper snapped, but immediately paused, realizing her slip.

Red smiled. "Only two weeks in, and your head is already so big. Given that your powers are highly efficient and powerful, you must be hearing praises all the time. But don't let it get to you. It could lead to a dangerous path."

Piper decided to keep quiet as Red walked up to her and patted her on the shoulder.

"It's been a long day for you. You may go now," Red said, watching her with attentive eyes.

Piper felt the rage disappearing, but she was still shaken, bewildered by it. Not wanting to say more, she simply nodded, collecting the mat and putting it back on top of the stack of mats in the back of the room. She headed towards the door, but stopped when Red spoke again.

"You don't need to tell me what triggers your anger—your fears. But, remember, _that_ is the key to your powers, good and bad. Don't let anyone use it against you."

* * *

><p>What Red had said continued to echo in Piper's mind, but she had more important thing to do at the moment. Piper ran back to the North Mansion, phone booths area. She pulled out her phone credit card, which allowed three phone calls a day, and put it over the scanner. When it beeped, she picked up the phone and called Larry.<p>

"Tell me you aren't hurt." Those were his first words. "Piper, I was worried sick! Are you ok? Was it bad? Why didn't you call earlier? I was—"

"What did your father say?" Piper pressed the phone closer to her ear. She could hear his breathing.

"He told me that you got into a fight with some resident. It sounded pretty bad. Are you ok, Piper? Are you hurt?"

"No, I…I'm fine. Don't worry. I'm not hurt." Piper felt a pang of guilt hit her. Someone else got hurt because of her, and she was scared to let Larry know. He would be scared too, if he knew. Anyone would be. Maybe she needed to listen to Red after all; whatever triggered her rage had to be dealt with. Properly, of course.

"Good. Good." Larry breathed easier.

"I'm sorry. I meant to call, but I was called to the office for an explanation about last night. It was really nothing, Larry. It was just… a big misunderstanding. It's all settled now."

"That's great to hear." Piper could imagine his smile as he said it. "Look, I've got a friend coming over tonight. His name is Pete. We've just met. He's an Australian, by the way. He seems like a guy with lots of connections _and_ lots of parties. I think he can hook me up with some writing gigs. He's cool."

"Lots of parties, huh?" Piper silently made a face. She didn't really want to imagine what her fiancé would be doing, partying out there, while she became violent and kicked people's asses to kill time.

"He's bringing like twenty people to our place tonight. I've got everything arranged. I even got your favorite dishes and wine. I'm sure they're going to like it."

"What's my favorite dish, Larry?"

"Umm, baked camembert? With red Bordeaux?"

"Hmm. That sounds good. You can marry me now."

"Marry me, Piper. Tomorrow."

Piper giggled, clinging to the phone with both hands. "Yeah, why not."

"I mean it. Marry me." Larry sighed. "I miss you so much. And last night… I got so fucking scared. I thought something terrible happened to you, and I couldn't even reach you. Dad wouldn't say much. No, it's not gonna work, Piper. I need you out of there. I want you here with me. Leave the island. I'll tell dad. Leave the island and marry me tomorrow."

"Marry you? Tomorrow?" Piper couldn't even believe her own ears. Against the popular belief of how a girl would look when in her position, Piper's smile faded somehow.

"This is not a joke. Can you take me seriously for once? Piper, I can't lose you."

"But you want to get married tomorrow? I've been here for only two weeks, Larry. We talked about this." Piper gulped, not wanting to stress the fact that she had just harmed other resident with her powers. Litchfield would never allow her to leave, at least not now.

Larry went on about his plan, and the whole conversation sent Piper's mind reeling. She pinched the bridge of her nose. _Jeez, I need a beer. Maybe Nicky has some._ "I'm not sure next week is a good time to marry, Larry. It's still too soon. I got some stuff to—" Piper paused when she spotted Nicky down the hallway.

The lion-haired woman was staring at her, arms across her chest. It seemed as though Nicky had been standing there for a while now. From the look on Nicky's face, she didn't seem too pleased, and Piper wasn't sure what to think.

Piper listened to Larry for a few more moments before they sent their goodnight kisses, and hang up. Nicky was still there, and Piper made a careful move towards the shorter woman. She was right not to speak a word, because Nicky sounded as upset as she looked.

"You were discussing your wedding party?" Nicky's frown grew deeper. Her expression was dead serious.

"Well… yeah, I—I'm engaged, you know that… Right?" Piper touched her hair, glancing around nervously. "I haven't seen you all day. Where have you been? You weren't even at the training today."

Nicky's lips tightened. "Because I was at the infirmary."

Piper reached out and touched Nicky's arm, genuinely concerned. "Are you ill? What's wrong?"

"You hurt my friend, that's what's wrong, Chapman. Vause collapsed during lunch, and she was sent to the infirmary. A fractured, right clavicle. Two broken ribs on the left, four on the right. And you were giggling, planning your wedding party after all of that shit? She got janitorial duties for being kicked in the ass, and you got nothing but special trainings? How do you do it?"

Piper couldn't move. Alex seemed all right this morning, didn't she? The woman had it all planned out, letting Piper lie to Healy. It was all scripted. Alex had nothing but a master plan.

"She knew that she's gonna be all right. It's who she is, Nicky. It's how she works. I know her." Piper insisted, but her voice was a little shaky. She had thought of Alex and her powers. Since Alex was nowhere to be seen in the large group of 'dangerous' powers training today, Piper had assumed that Alex was with the other group, the less threatening ones. "I...I admit that I was too rough, and I wouldn't have gone that far if I knew that she didn't have the kind of powers to defend herself. But she'd fight back if she knew that she was in real danger. She's always the one with plans."

Nicky was now red in the face. "Well, then she had a really stupid plan last night. And I know her better you do. You were just her fuck buddy anyway. The only reason she didn't fight back was because she couldn't have defended herself without hurting you. Fuck you, Chapman." Then Nicky pushed past Piper, and disappeared down the hall.

Piper froze.

_Alex…_

* * *

><p>Half past midnight. Piper carefully moved through the yard, avoiding the lit, graveled path. She had waited for Polly to fall asleep before sneaking out.<p>

Piper reached the small building next to the Gym, and entered. The infirmary had three floors. From what she had gathered from Polly, the patients would be on the second floor, one male ward, and one female ward.

Piper stopped at the entrance of the female ward, reading the chart hanging by the door. Visiting hours: 7 A.M. - 8 P.M. She shrugged and pushed the door open. Slowly and quietly. At this hour, the ward was kept dimly lit just like the corridors, and it worked just fine for Piper. There were about 30 beds, but only a few were occupied.

Piper looked around and saw a head of raven hair. She moved towards the bed next to the large window. Moonlight sneaked through the gap between the curtains, softly pooling over Alex's alabaster skin. Piper's breath caught in her throat. Suddenly all those nights they used to lie together in bed, holding each other, cherishing each other's warmth, came back and hit her like a speeding truck. It was nasty. It was unwelcome.

Now that Alex was in a blue hospital gown, Piper could see the fresh bandage on her left arm. Her heart was heavy with the thought of more bruises and cuts that were hidden beneath the gown. Alex looked tired and pale still, but a little more rested than this morning. Her hair was disheveled. Her breathing a little ragged.

Piper sat down at the edge of the bed. Before she could stop herself, she reached out and touched Alex's forehead, careful not to disturb the cut there.

"You don't let anything stop you, do you?" The voice came from a distance, and Piper turned to see an old, black lady sitting by the desk in the corner.

"You must be Ms. Claudette. Nice to meet you." Piper spoke with a neutral face, moving her hand down and gently stroke Alex's good arm. "She has fever."

"Of course, she does. She was supposed to come in since last night, but had stubbornly refused so. That girl never learned. She always made things more difficult than it had to be." Claudette studied Piper's hand on Alex. "She'll live. Nothing that won't heal. But my advice is to think twice before attacking someone, especially if you knew that you'd be breaking more rules just to pay them a visit at an ungodly hour."

"Are you going to report me?"

"So you can have more privileges granted? This place sometimes is a fart, but we've learned to live in it."

Piper inwardly sighed. Twitter had nothing on Litchfield. News here spread like wildfire.

Piper turned when she felt Alex move. The woman seemed to try to shift her body, but let out a pained whimper instead before falling back to her original position. Her eyes closed, her brows knitted, and she breathed harder. Piper leaned in closer, worries eating at her heart. She squeezed Alex's hand, trying to soothe the woman. "Al—"

"Pipes..."

For a moment, Piper had to squint in the dark to see if Alex was awake.

"...Pipes..." Alex breathed her name again, eyes still closed. And that was all it took. Piper's heart fluttered, butterflies in her stomach. It amazed her that no matter how much time had passed between them, the love and pain they have caused each other always felt like yesterday, fresh and raw.

Strangely, a contented, genuine smile graced Piper's beautiful face at a simple whisper of her name. Only Alex's voice could manage it for her. She reached up and softly caressed Alex's cheek. A hundred thoughts roamed through her mind, seeking which would be Alex's dream of her. Not a violent episode, she hoped.

"She's so warm. I hope she'll be feeling better tomorrow." Piper feigned a remark, knowing that Claudette was watching. Piper was warm too. She could feel the heat rise up to her cheeks and neck. For God's sake, she was blushing like a silly schoolgirl. She let go off Alex and stood up. The happy grin on her face, she turned to Claudette. "Thank you for letting me in, or—not kicking me out. I'll come back tomorrow... at a more appropriate hour."

Claudette just waved her away before turning her attention back to her laptop.

Piper leaned down to kiss Alex's forehead before taking the pair of black-rimmed glasses out of her black jacket's pocket. She put them on Alex's bed desk, and left.

"Young people," Claudette muttered, shaking her head. Then she looked up when she heard some rustling sounds. She sighed in annoyance when she saw that Alex had stubbornly rolled to her side, groaning in pain as she reached for her glasses.

Alex had an equally idiotic grin as Piper's on her face when she successfully put the glasses on.

"Please, tell me that you aren't going to sleep with your glasses on."

Alex fell back into bed again, a hand over her chest as she coughed. She lifted the curtain a little and looked out the window to see Piper walking across the yard. She lifted her hand from her chest and touched her forehead with the back of her hand. She didn't really want to go back to sleep at all.

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks all. <strong>xoxo


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

"You're sure about this?" Alex put her hands in her jacket pockets.

"You can't be serious. It's my birthday. We need some booze." Nicky grinned mischievously.

It was their normal night out. Nicky, being a teleporter, often took Alex to mainland, where they liked to hang out. They were roommates in the South as their parents couldn't afford to pay for the North.

Alex was in a black jacket with a white t-shirt underneath, and a pair of tight, black jeans. She was in her usual attires, worn and old. Most of the time, she felt comfortable in them, but there were days when she felt down, and let the bullying of the past caught up with her. Her life hadn't been great from the start. Her father left her mother when she was just a baby, and they basically lived in poverty. Diane, Alex's mother, worked four jobs to keep things going for them. But it only got worse when Alex was 'diagnosed' as being one of the 'gifted' at the age of 13. She was sent to Litchfield for 'better' trainings. Alex didn't feel that way. She thought it was just the government trying to lock away the unwanted—the dangerous ones from society. But she didn't object the idea. Sometimes she liked being away from the harsh reality. At least, she had three meals a day without having to see the stressful look on Diane's face. It pained her every time.

Alex pulled her collar closer. The wind was cold. She just didn't feel right tonight. "But we just did it last week. What if they remember us?"

"What's wrong with you? It's my fucking birthday. Don't ruin it." Nicky lightly elbowed her friend's arm, looking at the liquor store across the street.

Alex looked away for a second. "I'm 19 now. I can't get caught anymore. You do know that they are allowed to shoot first, ask later under any suspicious circumstances, concerning 'gifted' people over 18."

"You're scared?" Nicky turned to Alex, blinking. "Holy shit, Vause. You've never been scared before. What the hell is going on?"

Alex sighed, running her hand through her hair again for the tenth time tonight. "Mom is sick."

"Diane." Nicky gasped. "Is it serious?"

"Kind of. She needs a back surgery. She doesn't have insurance, and she can't work like she used to. I can't get caught, Nicky. I have to work when she can't." Alex lightly groaned, looking away. "I think I'm gonna drop out. I… I'm leaving Litchfield. I need something real, not a fucking diploma for the 'gifted' that gets me nowhere. I need a job."

Nicky stared at her friend in disbelief. "Fuck. You can't fucking leave me. No. Fuck. No. Howard wouldn't let you leave."

"I have to. I can control my powers just fine now. I'll be fine."

"God, Vause, don't leave. We're family! You got me, and I got you. I'll ask mom if she can help."

"Don't be silly. It's a lot of money." Alex shook her head. "I'll ask my aunt. She's doing pretty well, I think. I'll just have to work and pay her back, but it's gonna take years though."

Nicky leaned back against the lamppost and let out a frustrated sigh, pulling her own fluffy hair with both hands to the back of her head. She looked saddened. "I'm going to miss you. A lot."

Alex smiled. Her green eyes sparkled in the dark. "Me too."

Nicky chuckled, and then gestured towards the liquor store. "Hey, one last time. Consider it a farewell gift to me."

"Serious?" Alex groaned.

"Serious."

"But you ran us to fucking Nevada last time we stole three bottles. I don't like that, Nicky. I got really sick when you do that." Alex made a disgusted face.

"Motion sickness is my powerful weapon," Nicky joked. "But, come on, I feel good tonight. I am so much in control! I promise I won't run off too far. Have some faith in me, pal."

Alex gazed out at the liquor store, hands in her pockets. "I don't know. Where will we land—" She cried out in surprise and pain at the same time as a set of mass hit her. Shoved to the ground, Alex was sprawled on her stomach, coughing for air. She couldn't even tell what had just hit her. What was it? A human, or a truck?

Lying on her back, Alex opened her eyes to see a bulky, young police officer looming above her, his eyes glowing dangerously.

"Freeze!" Bennett held a gun at Alex's face. "I've seen you two several times before, but you're not going anywhere this time!"

Alex stared at the barrel only an inch away from her face. To her dismay, Nicky was nowhere to be seen.

_Fuck_.

* * *

><p><em>Fuck<em>.

Alex groaned as her mind slowly came to. She opened her eyes to see three vibrant faces above hers, beaming at her.

"Vause! Good morning!" Bennett grinned.

"Hey." Nicky had the usual lopsided smile on her face.

"How are you feeling?" Lorna greeted Alex with a sweet smile.

_Where am I? What day is it? What time is it?_ Alex took a moment to answer all the questions before glancing at her glasses on the nightstand. Piper was really here last night. The pains were still very apparent. She wasn't dreaming or imagining any of it. She grabbed the glasses and put them on.

"Morning," Alex said eventually, her voice coarse.

"Oh, you got your glasses back," Nicky remarked.

"Uh… Piper stopped by last night. I guess she found it," Alex mumbled, glancing away at the look on Nicky's face.

Nicky was smiling so widely that her cheeks hurt. "She came here last night? Maybe because I gave her an earful. But, pimp, really… what's with you two?"

Bennett turned to Nicky. "Piper? Piper Chapman, the new blonde girl? I think that I've seen her around."

"That's right, John. The one and only future Mrs. Bloom," Lorna said, putting the fresh flowers she had brought into the vase on Alex's nightstand.

"Yup, _the_ bitch. I have no fucking clue what our friend here has got herself into," Nicky said, staring down at Alex.

"Ouch." Bennett whistled.

Alex tried to turn a deaf ear. She had learned from Lorna since the night she had arrived that Piper was engaged to Larry Bloom. Piper was now the talk of the town in Litchfield.

Alex and Piper broke up four years ago, and they both had moved on. Alex, however, never committed before or after Piper, so to see Piper having a serious relationship did rattle her. She realized that she was everything opposite to 'Larry Bloom'. He was rich, safe and had a respectable last name to go by. She was a poor woman with shady records. She was everything Piper didn't want. Even though she had never met Larry, but a simple mention of him could easily upset her.

Alex slowly sat up and leaned back against her pillows. Her head was messy, her skin colorless, and her eyes reddened. The pain started to twist inside her, and the headache was coming back fast. She'd need some painkillers soon. Somehow it upset her that she couldn't be up to Healy's challenge. She had certainly missed the janitorial duties he had assigned her on the first day.

_He'll never let that go_. Alex griped.

Healy was her counselor when she first moved to Litchfield. He had become her first father figure. He had been generous, and she had been the child he never had. They had fitted somehow. They had got along well until Alex had got her first girlfriend. He hadn't taken it well and shunned her out. Alex hadn't taken it well either. She hadn't fancied being rejected twice in her young life.

"Ouch—OUCH! S—slowly!" A yelp came through the doors, and everyone turned to look at the entrance.

Alex frowned when she saw Jessica Wedge coming through the doors, the blonde's arms hanging around her friends' shoulders.

"Easy! That hurts! Easy!" Jessica squealed as she was laid down on the bed opposite to Alex's. She was accompanied by her three friends.

One of the blondes looked around and saw Alex, and immediately made a face. "We're not alone, girls. The bum is here."

Alex couldn't believe it. These girls had hold her hostage since she was 13, ridiculing her every chance they get. Now that she's 29, they still wouldn't let it go.

Alex had a smirk on her face when Jessica looked up and caught the green gaze. "Slipped on your own ice?"

"Fuck you, Vause," the second blonde spat.

"Better than being broke and crawling back to Litchfield like a beggar. But this is nothing new, is it? Because you've always been one," another blonde chimed in. And the gang just laughed.

Nicky growled, already making a move towards the blondes, but both Lorna and Bennett pulled her back.

"Not a good idea, Nicky," Bennett warned.

"Let them talk," Lorna said. And only then Nicky seemed to cool down.

Smirking, Jessica quickly composed herself. She leaned back against the head bed as a nurse entered the infirmary.

The chubby nurse, Daya Diaz, walked up to Alex and handed her a cup containing two yellow pills. "Those are for the pain. Try not to move too much. Ms. Claudette already spoke with Mr. Healy about your conditions, so you don't have to go until your health is improved. You'll feel better in a month or two."

"Hi... g-good morning, Daya," Bennett said as he moved closer to the nurse.

"Morning, John." Daya's expression remained nonchalant as she moved to Jessica's bed and began to tend to her swollen ankle. "What happened?"

"I... fell down the stairs and sprained my ankle. It hurts like hell." Jessica looked away briefly, but her gaze soon fell back on Alex again.

Alex poured herself a cup of water, in which Lorna approached to help. "It's ok. I can do it." She quickly took the pills. She pushed the blanket away and slowly got up from the bed.

"Where are you going?" Nicky frowned.

Alex began to walk away. "I'm gonna get changed. I already feel a lot better today. Janitorial duties are really nothing. Easy. Don't worry," Alex lied. It already hurt just to move this much. The nasty bruises on her back and legs only made things more difficult. Times like this just made her wish for healing abilities instead. But Alex just couldn't stand the Fantastic Four; she would rather hurt herself than being in the same room with them.

"Whoa, I don't think that's a good idea, Vause," Nicky said, reaching for Alex. But she was just a second too late when Alex took a step forward and slipped on a thin plane of ice that had magically appeared there a moment prior.

The four blondes burst out laughing as Alex landed on her butt. The impact sent nasty waves of pain through her body, and for a moment it became really hard to breathe. But Alex just kept her face cool and not saying anything, not even a whimper, because she couldn't even find her voice then.

"Vause!" Bennett scurried to kneel next to Alex. "Are you all right!?"

Before Alex could even try to understand the situation she was in, as her mind was being largely clouded by pain, the blondes suddenly screamed in fright.

Nicky had teleported herself next to Jessica, catching the woman off-guard, grabbing her and throwing her off the bed. Jessica landed face first at the floor, much to her friends' horror.

The first blonde reacted fast, growing her arms long across the room, grabbing Nicky by the arms and throwing her at the wall. Nicky tried to lose the grip, but the constant thrust against the wall and the pain that followed kept her from teleporting away. Nicky was losing her concentration.

"Ladies! Stop!" Bennett shouted.

"Keep your gross hands off her!" Lorna barked. Her usually sweet smile turned into a fierce growl. Fire bolts shot from her hands and burned the blonde's elastic arms, causing her to release Nicky at once.

Nicky fell to the floor, coughing for air.

"Stop it! Everyone!" Daya yelled, but her voice was drowned out by a sonic boom from another blonde minion.

Alex was still sitting on the floor, numbed. Her hands on her knees, she watched the scene unfold as Bennett and Daya joined in, attempting to stop the four blondes, while Lorna kept shooting fire bolts everywhere to keep the attacks at bay.

Alex noted the burning curtains, a few frozen beds and chairs, and broken glasses on the floor. She sighed.

_Great_.

* * *

><p>It was the first time in more than two weeks that Piper had felt uneasy during yoga class. Even the meditation session hadn't helped. The powers trainings had only made it worse. Piper had barely able to move a brick without hitting it at something. She had gone to bed last night wide-eyed with such excitement she hadn't felt for years. She had woken this morning, exhausted and scared.<p>

Nicky had been absent all day today. The woman was probably still very angry with her, but Piper wasn't worried about that. She could try to reason with Nicky later. However, it had taken Piper all day to accept the fact that the source of her uneasiness did come from last night. It had always been a problem. 'Alex' had always been her problem. Ever since they parted, she never welcomed any thoughts or memories of that woman. But on her loneliest days or on the darkest nights, 'Alex' had always emerged. It had been four fucking years, but every time she'd feel powerless whenever she recalled the times they shared.

Piper believed that she visited Alex last night out of guilt, and guilt alone. Whatever that had happened between them was just an episode of angry tears and mistrust. She had grown up, and out of it. She had become someone new, and she was just being upset with Alex because the woman had reminded her of her old, stupid self. Nothing more. Not that Piper wanted an apology from Alex as it wouldn't have made any difference now.

_I wonder if she's feeling better today—_

"Piper... Piper, are you listening?"

Piper was snapped out of her thoughts. "Yeah, Cal. What?"

"Larry's been at my trailer park for the past couple of days. He's been asking me what foods and drinks to serve at the wedding, or which new tux he should wear. Sister, this is driving me crazy. How soon can you get out of Litchfield?"

"God." Piper huffed. "I told him that this isn't the best time. I just attacked another resident with my powers! There's no way they're letting me out soon. All this talk about the wedding is pointless, really."

"What happened?" Cal sounded more serious. He sounded genuinely concerned about his sister, and it touched her.

"It… it wasn't an accident like how it happened with… with you. I wanted to hurt her, and I did. It was fucking scary, Cal. I fucking hurt people, and I don't know how to stop."

A moment passed. "Why? What did she do to you?"

For a moment, Piper couldn't find her words. Her thoughts weren't exactly coherent either. The good times were so good. The bad times were hellish. There were many moments when Piper was convinced that anything that had happened between Alex and her was just a lie. But once in a while, a tiny, little fraction of hope would rise and tell her that it was real.

Piper held the phone close to her face. "She made me love her."

Piper could hear her brother sigh. "Do you love her?"

"I, no..."

Piper didn't say more, and Cal didn't ask any further. Piper had planned to visit Alex after dinner, but it seemed like a bad idea now.

* * *

><p>"Did you hear about Nichols?" Polly muttered over her soup.<p>

Piper looked up from her food. They were having dinner together in the cafeteria.

Polly cautiously pointed her spoon at the Fantastic Four's direction. The blondes were occupying two rows behind. Jessica, however, was missing. The three blondes looked beat, their face pale and their hair scruffy and dirty.

Piper stifled her laugh, and then whispered to Polly, "They looked like they'd just gone to World War I and back. Did something happen? And, no, I haven't seen Nicky all day."

"Nichols and her friends got into a huge fight with the Fantastic Four at the infirmary this morning. They went totally crazy! The female ward was destroyed! Oh, you should see it." Polly laughed.

_Alex_... Piper's hands fell on the table ever so subtly.

"Supercunt always got herself into some sort of trouble. Not surprised, considering the sort of friends she hangs out with. I was glad you got to kick her butt."

"Uh… well, it was a misunderstanding. But why do you call her 'Supercunt'? You seem to really dislike her."

"She's just crazy and rude. She's been a trouble maker ever since she got here. Years ago, her mother needed some sort of surgery, but they couldn't afford it. Eventually, Mr. Bloom paid for them, because he really cared for her family. But Vause just didn't seem to care. She left Litchfield two years later without an explanation. Mr. Bloom was disappointed, obviously, since he had high hopes in her."

"Why would he care? Were they that close?" Piper took in all the information. For an ex of Alex, she knew very little about her life. All Alex had shown her was the world of luxury and exciting adventures, but nothing about the hardship from the past. To an extent, Alex succeeded; she impressed Piper. However, there had been a few moments, as rare as they had, that Piper had caught glimpses of sadness and insecurities in those green eyes. It was these few moments that still convinced Piper that what they had was real, and not all glamorous and superficial to the eyes of outsiders.

Polly leaned over the table, whispering, "I'm not sure if I should tell you this. He's going to be your father-in-law soon."

"Not so soon. I don't even know when they'll let me go. I did really bad in powers trainings today. Red was unimpressed," Piper grumbled. Of course, that was to be expected since Piper accidentally hit the instructor with a brick. Luckily, it wasn't anything serious.

"Aww, don't push yourself too hard. You have all the time in the world."

"Nope. I have to get out ASAP. Larry is waiting for me. What about Mr. Bloom? You were saying?"

Polly shrugged, and lowered her voice even more. "They say that he was having an affair with Vause's mother. And that it was probably the reason Vause left so suddenly. Maybe she found out then."

"Oh... oh, wow..." Piper immediately thought of Larry's mother. She wasn't sure how to make her face next time she sees the Blooms.

"Hey, Chapman."

The voice came from behind, and Piper beamed. She turned around. "Nicky!" But her smile faded when she saw bruises and cuts on Nicky's face and arms. The woman's thick hair was wet, and she was already in her fresh clothes, suggesting that she already had a shower.

With a tray of food, Nicky sat down next to Piper. "Almost missed dinner! Oh, boy, what a day!"

Polly groaned. Their table had promptly attracted attention from the nearby tables, deadly glares from the three blondes.

Piper eagerly turned to Nicky. She was relieved that nothing serious seemed to have happened at the infirmary. "Where have you been? What happened?"

"We kicked their asses alright. Hey, it felt good to flex your muscles once in a while." Nicky winked. "So Healy punished Morello and me. We're doing Vause's janitorial duties for the next two months until she gets better. As for those dumb blondes right there? They have to pay for renovation of the ward since they started the fight."

"They did?" Polly raised a brow in disbelief.

"Can you not be a cunt for a day? Or that table is available." Nicky gestured at Jessica minions' table.

"What did they do?" Piper asked before Polly could retort. She wanted to ask about Alex, but didn't want to make it obvious in front of her roommate, not to mention that she wasn't sure if Nicky was in a better mood to talk about Alex than yesterday.

"Wedge, the fucking ice witch, sprained her ankle and was brought in this morning. But she couldn't help being a bitch. She cast the ice on the floor, and Vause slipped and hurt herself again. So I smacked the bitch real good, but then that fucking blonde right there with nasty, long arms just—"

Piper shot up from the chair. She grabbed the tray and put it on top of the garbage bin before sprinting out of the cafeteria. She didn't stop when Polly called out. She ran out the building and headed towards the infirmary. She didn't like it at all. She didn't like the feeling of not being in control. And to make matters worse, Alex was vulnerable in Litchfield, unable to protect herself from Healy and the likes of Jessica Wedge. There was nothing Piper could do about it, and she hated it. It was rage. A rage so familiar.

* * *

><p>Alex shifted a little on her new bed, a book in her hands. The few patients from female ward had moved to a smaller room provided on the third floor. To her dismay, Jessica was assigned to the bed next to her.<p>

Jessica was supposed to go back to her dorm after having her ankle treated. But the fight happened, and she had hit her head pretty hard, her nose broken and her face severely swollen. Ms. Claudette insisted that Jessica stayed for a night.

Sitting on her bed, Jessica put her tablet down on her lap. "This is boring—ahh—ouch—" She grunted as pain shot up the left side of her skull, her left cheek hurt from speaking.

Alex giggled, and Jessica turned to glare at her, tears in her eyes.

"My mother will speak to Mr. Bloom as soon as he—oh… oww..." Jessica stopped to take a breath in. "... as soon as he's back. You'll be expelled for good, Alex. You're not welcome here."

Alex smirked at the first name usage. She was just wondering when Jessica would drop the act. "I get it. You don't like me. But Litchfield isn't yours, Jess. And you can avoid me by not intentionally falling down the stairs."

Jessica's jaw would have dropped lower only if her swollen face would allow. "You think I was that desperate to see you? Oh, Alex, you are as delusional as ever. Who would love someone like you?" Jessica scoffed. "I'm seeing Richard, a man who can afford a fancy dinner without having to sell his mother's car. You've been gone for eight years, Alex. Nobody's waiting for you anymore." Then Jessica smiled. "Did I hear right about you and Chapman? It seems that she has wised up too. Everyone has moved on, and you're the only one stuck in the past."

_Oh, God…_ Alex put her book down and sighed. If she had any money left, she'd have escaped with Fiona, her flying girlfriend. Litchfield would be her last option since it was full of exes and flings of the past. She knew it'd get messy, the extra hassles she didn't need. To make things even more complicated, Piper had just happened to move here too, the last person she wanted to see when she was at the all-time low in life.

Alex looked up at Jessica, adjusting her glasses. "Look, it was a one-night stand, all right? Like you said, it was eight years ago, _and_ we were both drunk. I know that my low life disgusts you, but for God's sake, can you just drop it? I've never told anyone about this. Not even Nicky. After all these years, I can't believe that you're still holding it against me."

"You were drunk. I wasn't." The words came in a whisper.

Alex stopped. She could barely see Jessica's eyes under the bandages around the woman's head. The woman's face was so swollen that Alex couldn't make out her facial expression either. But silence had quickly hung over them, and Alex wasn't quite sure what to say next. She had never imagined herself as the little girl being picked on by a boy who was having a crush on her. Jessica being the boy was a disturbing thought, indeed.

Jessica put her hand up to her left cheek, barely touching.

"It hurts?"

Jessica just nodded. From the silence, Alex guessed that the pain must be rather unbearable for it to silence Jessica.

Alex put her book on the bed and got up. She carefully sat down on the edge of Jessica's bed. She raised a hand and softly touched Jessica's good cheek. She inwardly winced as she now was close enough to see how bad Jessica's face was. Under the bandages, the skin around her eyes and down her left cheek was all purple and black. It looked very painful.

Jessica bit her bottom lip and leaned forward. Alex gently pulled her closer, letting her rest her good cheek against her shoulder.

"Fuck you, Alex. It… fucking hurts," Jessica mumbled.

Alex chortled. "It's almost seven now. Daya will bring your meds soon." She could feel Jessica's wet tears on her shoulder, but made no move to push her away.

"Alex!" A voice echoed outside, followed by a few, rash knocks on the window.

Both Alex and Jessica turned to the window. They were on the third floor, but a red-haired woman was floating just outside the window. She forcefully pushed the window open, and leaped into the building. She was leggy, perhaps as tall as Alex, with wild, curly red tresses.

"Fiona? What are you doing here?" Alex found her voice dry. She didn't expect to see her girlfriend again so soon. They parted only two days ago. Fiona didn't promise to come back, and Alex didn't promise to wait. Fiona had been scared and wanted to escape as far as she could. Alex hadn't able to follow, and she had let her go.

"I… I don't want to leave without you. I can't! I'm back for you, baby. We'll go together. I don't care what I have to do." Fiona's voice was shaken. She rushed to Alex and pulled her away from Jessica's embrace.

Alex grunted at the pressure on her body, quivered in pain.

"Alex…" Fiona eventually pulled back, and was alarmed to see how pale her girlfriend looked. "Are you hurt? Why are you in a hospital gown…? Oh, God… Who fucking hurt you!? Alex—"

"Al!" Piper's voice came through as the door was pushed open. The slender blonde was out of breath as she skidded by the entrance. Her blue eyes were wide, and as vibrant with life as Alex had always remembered.

Alex took a deep breath in, trying to steady herself on her feet. She gradually straightened up, and lazily pushed her glasses up to rest atop her head. She was staring down at nothing in particular, very much aware of the three gazes fixing upon her.

Alex silently sighed.

_Great._


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

Before the night could get even more disastrous than the day had been, Ms. Claudette stood up from her chair, an active laptop on the desk. She was warmed in a blue jacket and a pair of black gloves. She had been watching in the corner of the room. Amazingly, no one had noticed her.

_Young people_. Ms. Claudette shook her head.

"You three girls need to sort things out with your tall girlfriend outside, and by that, I mean, _out of here_. We can't afford to ruin more rooms, understood?" Ms. Claudette warned.

Alex sighed in relief at the divine intervention. She glanced at Piper, but the blonde quickly looked away. She had only realized then that Fiona still had her arms around her. It couldn't have been jealousy, could it? She reminded herself that Piper was engaged, and that their past had meant nothing.

Quietly, Piper left. And Alex made no move to stop her, even though she'd been waiting for Piper to visit all day. She stood, watching the empty doorway. It felt so familiar-that emptiness in her heart. It wasn't supposed to be this way. They weren't supposed to fall in love. Alex was smart, but whenever the matter concerned Piper, she was rendered a clueless ingénue. Even years later, she still didn't know how to fix it, and it fucking frustrated her to no end.

* * *

><p>Alex had put on a black coat over her hospital gown. Hands in the pockets, she leaned back against the brick wall behind the infirmary. She and Fiona had taken their little reunion outside as Ms. Claudette had commanded. The wind was cold, combined with the hectic day it had been, Alex had already lost the much-needed energy from last night's rest.<p>

"I miss you. I thought I could do it without you, but no." Fiona shook her head, her eyes reddened. "Who's that girl?"

"Jessica Wedge, my old classmate. There's really nothing going on between us," Alex answered. For once, she was being honest. She didn't know why she should care what Fiona thought now, but for some reason, being back at Litchfield had made her feel different for the first time in years. She felt like she could just be her old self again, and not what the outside world had made her become.

"I meant the other blonde, who had just left. Your visitor. She looks familiar."

Alex sighed. "It doesn't matter. You better go now, Fiona, before they kick you out. People here aren't as friendly as they advertise on TV, you know."

"_We_ should go. Kubra will find you here. This isn't the most creative place to hide, you gotta admit that."

Alex nodded tiredly. "Yeah, I know." But, in truth, she didn't know where else she could go.

Fiona moved closer to Alex, pulling her into her arms. Her embrace was strong, uncharacteristically needy. Perhaps, the woman was deeply scared. It did warm Alex's heart that Fiona had missed her. In her weak moment, it just felt nice to know that she was loved.

"Let's leave together. I don't want to be with anyone else. I miss you so much," Fiona whispered into Alex's ear.

Without much thought, Alex slumped against Fiona for comfort, her breathing a little shallow. She was usually the dominant one in a relationship, but every once in a while, her mask crumbled. Right now it felt as though her ship had just sunk, and she was lost at sea. To have a shoulder to lean on was much needed. "He'll find me. Maybe... maybe it should really end here," she murmured.

"Alex! Why are you talking like that!? I'm not gonna let him get you. No way. Come with me." Fiona tightened her embrace, and Alex found it hard to breathe.

"He wants me dead, so it's best that you stay away. It's for your own safety. We talked about this, Fiona."

"But I-"

"There's still time. I think that he isn't mad enough to raid Litchfield. Not yet anyway."

"But he will, sooner or later. He takes sick, deep revenge. He's merciless, you know him."

Alex pulled away from Fiona, needing some air. She pressed one hand over her right ribcage. It throbbed again. In fact, it hurt all over her body. She just needed a rest.

"Baby, are you all right? You look so pale. You haven't told me what happened." Fiona frowned. She studied Alex for a moment, and then glanced around. It was dark and deserted behind the infirmary.

Alex began to cough. "Just a... small accident. Don't worry—" The air was suddenly knocked out of her lungs when she felt a harsh grip around her neck. She was thrust back, her head rammed against the cold wall. She could hardly breathe now, and her eyes were seeing stars. She tried to push Fiona away, her legs kicking limply.

Alex opened her eyes again. Her glasses had already fallen off, but she was more than certain that the person strangling her right now wasn't her girlfriend.

_What the hell... Mendez…?_

Standing at 248 cm., Mendez glowered down at Alex with his yellow, lizard-like eyes. His brownish skin was thick and scaly. His ears were large and pointy, his long tail wagging in curiosity. He was holding Alex up by the neck, her feet high above the ground. He stuck his black, long tongue out and licked the side of her face. "I've always wanted to do that." He smirked.

Alex growled in anger. George Mendez was one of Kubra's men. A nasty crew. He was powers absorber through deaths of his victims. His scaly, monster form was just one of his past victims' powers. And the fact that he could now fly only meant one thing.

_Fiona… No!_

Alex knew that she needed to fight. 'Alex Vause' would fight. But she wasn't even sure who she was anymore. She had lost her way little by little over the years since she had left Litchfield eight years ago. She had lost it just like Healy said. Desperate to prove Healy wrong, Alex searched within her, trying her damnedest to conjure her powers, but she felt nothing. Nothing but pain.

_Mom. _Alex called out as her consciousness was slipping away fast.

* * *

><p>Piper wasn't sure what to make of her face the moment she barged into the temporary female ward and saw Alex in a certain redhead's embrace. It was totally unexpected. She had never seen the redhead around Litchfield before, but it didn't matter, did it? The moment she walked out of Alex's life four years ago, she had never expected Alex to wait for her-to still feel for her. Piper had moved on and found someone better, and it was only natural that Alex did too.<p>

It really shouldn't have bothered Piper at all... except that it did. So much and so sudden that she was at a loss for words. It drilled a deep hole in her chest. She stiffened as she stood by the doorway, unsure how to react. She had come unprepared to give an excuse for the visit, and being momentarily speechless just made it worse. If only Alex would speak up-if she said anything at all, it might have helped Piper feel a little better. If Alex somehow awkwardly freed herself from the redhead's hold, it might have pulled Piper out of the quicksand of their past. Strangely, as definite as Piper had everything waited for her as soon as she was able to leave Litchfield, just one look at Alex could rattle her world. The piercing green gaze effortlessly mesmerized her, rocking her foundations and twisting all her reasons.

Piper cleared her throat when Ms. Claudette made her presence known. Alex looked relieved as if she had been waiting for some kind of intervention. What was there to explain? Piper turned to see an annoyed Jessica, and then a brooding look from the redhead. Slowly a train of thoughts entered her mind.

_Oh, no_... Piper refused to imagine things further. She caught Alex glancing at her, but ignored it. Before her imagination could run wilder than it already had, she turned on her heels and left.

* * *

><p>Stalking across the yard towards the North Mansion, Piper continued to curse herself for having slipped this far down the Vause's evil slope. She reminded herself not to waste a second of sympathy on Alex again. Ever. She vowed to keep her distance from now on.<p>

_She doesn't deserve my time. Not at all. We're from two different worlds. _Arms tight across her chest, Piper quickened her pace as if she couldn't get herself further away from the infirmary fast enough. _But she still looks so ill. _Involuntarily, Piper acknowledged that it was her fault.

"Dammit." Piper turned around and headed back towards the infirmary.

Piper admitted that it looked ridiculous that she had shown up unannounced, and then left without any explanation. What had she got to be afraid of? It was just Alex standing there with her girlfriend. It shouldn't bother her. However, Piper had never imagined the jealous look on Jessica's face. She had thought that the Fantastic Four hated everyone—anything from the South like they were leeches. But she should have expected anything when the matter concerned 'Alex Vause'.

With long strides, Piper reached the third floor. She pushed open the doors to the temporary female ward, but was puzzled to find only Jessica, Daya, and a few other patients on the beds. Alex and her girlfriend apparently had already left. Piper paused for a moment, fidgety by the doorway. She hated all the thoughts that were rushing in her head at the moment. Where did Alex go? She wasn't well enough to be moving this much, was she? Was Alex serious with that redhead? What they could have been doing at the moment—

"They're probably downstairs. Ms. Claudette asked them to leave," Daya explained, while handing some pills to Jessica.

Piper let out a soft 'oh', trying her best to keep her face calm. Then there was that growl from Jessica again, and Piper stopped. She remembered how Jessica and her minions threatened her to stay away from Alex—to stay out of 'trouble'. Somehow, it seemed rather apparent to her now.

"They're in the backyard. It's how Alex likes it," Jessica said, smirking.

Piper raised a brow. _Thanks, bitch_. She had to admire Jessica for even trying to move a facial muscle, considering how painful it looked. "Thanks, Wedge," Piper said, turning to leave. In all honesty, she didn't want to imagine what Alex was doing. She just wanted to apologize for the damage she had done, and from now on, she would maintain their distance. The past was just a past. She had no wish to undo it, or correct it. She had a much better life now without Alex. Surely they would go separate ways.

Piper exited the main entrance, and turned around the corner of the building. She halted in her tracks when she heard an ongoing conversation.

"... maybe it should really end here."

One hand rested against the wall, Piper listened attentively. It was Alex's voice, but for some reason, it hurt just to hear how tired Alex was. 'Alex Vause' was supposed to be strong and beautiful. She was supposed to be water in a desert storm—the moon in the darkest night. But the light had disappeared. That fire Piper used to see in the green eyes had gone. Unlike the time they were still together, Alex had now looked defeated. Against all her reasons, Piper couldn't help but wonder what had happened during the four years they were apart. She wanted to know. She needed to know if she wasn't the only one who suffered.

Piper was shaken as thoughts of those years hung heavily on her mind. She wasn't strong enough to face it now. Larry had been a home to her—a safe place, and she wasn't equipped for something as wild and strange as Litchfield. The place had brought out more raw feelings than she had ever anticipated. Litchfield had made her feel different in many ways.

"Why are you talking like that!? I'm not gonna let him get you... Come with me."

"… It's best that you stay away. We talked about this, Fiona."

Piper froze, her fists clenched. Was Alex in some kind of danger? Who tried to harm Alex? Then she frowned when she heard a thud and a muffled cry. She turned at the corner and saw a large, lizard monster instead of Fiona, holding Alex up by the neck. The raven-haired woman appeared helpless in the deadly grasp.

Piper's eyes widened at the sight. "Alex!" Her cry caught the monster's attention. He turned to look at her, and then smiled.

"And I thought you look familiar. Now I see. Piper Chapman, the one that Vause hid away." Mendez let out a throaty laugh. "No more hiding, Chapman. I am going to take your life tonight!" he roared.

"Run—" Alex struggled in his grasp. "Run, Pipes! He kills to steal powers—" He shove her against the wall again, and pain shot through her whole.

"I'll kill you first then. Traitor," Mendez hissed. He arched his right arm back, his sharp claws ready.

"No!" Piper reached out both hands. Her powers sent both Alex and the lizard flying and crashing several meters away. _Shit!_ Her control over her powers got really wonky today, unfortunately.

Piper ran to Alex, trying to pull Alex up. But the taller woman didn't fare well at all as she could barely sit up on her own. Blood was trickling down Alex's forehead, where she had hit the wall twice.

"Alex! Alex! Are you all right!?" Piper ran her hands all over Alex's face.

Alex winced. She had to grab Piper's wrists to stop the blonde's frantic hand movements. "I'm… ok... Piper, stop—"

"You're bleeding! Are you sure—"

At the lizard's roar, Alex turned to see him flying above them, his large wings fanned out. He dove down and snatched Piper with his claws, hooking at the base of her neck and her left ribcage.

"Pipes!" Horror filled the green eyes when the lizard ascended fast and let Piper freefall down to the infirmary's roof. From where Alex was, she couldn't see if Piper was still moving or not. The fall was pretty high, and the impact must have been nasty.

"Alex!" Jessica and Daya came out through the front door, rushing towards Alex.

"What happened!? We heard crashes!" Daya was out of breath.

"Alex, you're bleeding! What's going on here!?" Jessica grabbed Alex's arms, trying to steady the woman's swaying form. She looked around and spotted Alex's glasses some distance away. She let Daya help Alex while she went to retrieve the glasses.

"Explain yourself at once, Vause. What is happening here?" It was Ms. Claudette approaching, her voice stern and her stare intense.

Before Alex could respond, Jessica glanced up at the sky, her jaw dropped. The look had both Ms. Claudette and Daya turning to look up as well. The large lizard was zooming down at the roof again, the long tail wrapping around Piper's neck and pulling her up.

"Is that Chapman!?" Daya screamed in shock.

"Looks like it," Jessica grunted, momentarily ignoring her face pain. She shot ice balls at the lizard in an attempt to distract him, while trying not to hit the injured Piper. Although the lizard was huge, he was exceptionally fast, skillfully dodging Jessica's attacks.

Alex leaned against Daya, her breathing heavy. She felt a rush of rage building within her when Mendez slammed Piper down against the tiled roof again. Piper wasn't even moving now. There was no resistance from the blonde, and Alex's heart sank to the bottomless pitch of desperation. She was enraged with herself that she could only watch, powerless to help. She was pained to realize what a failure she had become. A failure to her mother, her mentor, Fiona... and now Piper.

_Piper... Piper... God, Piper..._

Pain flooded her senses. Her head ached like it was going to explode. Alex shut her eyes as her body began to shake. She clenched her fists. She wanted to let it out, but she was afraid. She was afraid of the monster inside—the one that she had learned to embrace, but failed her in the end.

Daya noted Alex's tremble, and turned to her in worry. "Vause—" But her voice was drowned by a bolt of lightning blasting down at the roof. Its explosive shock wave cracked the roof, tiles flying everywhere in broken bits and pieces. The force sent Mendez off the roof, plummeting to the ground. Piper fell from his grasp and hit the ground next to him.

The sight of Piper's still body only fanned Alex's fury. She pushed Daya out of her way, stalking across the yard towards the lizard. The moment Mendez got up to his knees, Alex reached forwards, and bolts of electric current shot through his mouth and eyes, effectively chaining him to his knees as if he was begging as he should be. If Mendez was screaming, no one heard him as violent waves of electric current deafened the whole area. It looked like Mendez was going to die a painful death tonight.

"That's enough, Vause!" Ms. Claudette warned.

Daya rushed to Piper and dragged her as far away from the lightning striker as much as possible.

"I said—" Ms. Claudette started, but Alex fiercely turned around and blasted a lightning bolt at her. The old lady would have been struck had not been a wall of ice blocking between her and Alex.

"Alex! Stop it! Have you gone mad!?" Jessica squealed when Alex turned to roar at her.

Alex couldn't stop now. It felt so natural to her—the powers she had embraced. It represented her. It consumed her. It _was_ her. She produced more powers. Beautiful, blue electric currents licked at her fists, ready to be discharged. Her eyes were not even green anymore, but glossed in icy blue.

"Alex, no—" Jessica took a step back.

Before Alex could deliver the strike, a hand had reached out and softly touched her cheek, instantly dulling her. It was Ms. Claudette. The old lady had moved beside Alex, her right glove removed. The dangerous sight told Alex what to expect.

The electric currents simply vanished, her energy drained. Her mind became hazy, her focus lost. Then she began to shake. It felt as though air was sucked out of her lungs, and her skin was about to split, bones about to break. Her vision blurred, and her ears were numbed by the loud, desperate beating of her heart. Her knees finally gave in, and blackness devoured her.

_Piper..._

* * *

><p><strong>Hope<strong> this chap answered some of your questions :)


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

"It's a little cold out for a margarita, don't you think?"

Piper laughed as Alex delivered the line. Alex was trying to imitate the moment they first met at the bar. It was a joke they liked to tease each other. Piper couldn't believe how fast the months had gone.

Holding big grocery bags, they walked along the bridge, heading back to Alex's apartment.

Piper smiled so widely that her cheeks hurt, but she kept telling herself that it was the cold wind. "That's the worst pick-up line I've ever heard. And you're the worst girlfriend I've ever had."

"I'm hurt." Alex giggled. Her foggy breath clouded her glasses. Her cheeks were red. Her skin was pale and delicate like snow itself. She was wearing a navy-colored, bubble jacket, a black t-shirt underneath and a pair of worn jeans. No matter how simple the attires were, Piper always found Alex looking good in almost everything, especially when she was wearing nothing.

Piper took another long glance at her girlfriend. Even though they'd been spending a lot of time together, it never felt enough for her. She could watch Alex forever. "Please tell me you didn't always use that line, because that would be so lame." Piper lightly elbowed the woman.

"You'd be surprised." Alex chortled. "No, you're so not gonna get it out of me, Piper Chapman. I won't tell you how I picked them up, or I'd never hear the end of it. You're one jealous girlfriend."

"I am not. I don't care how many girls you've dated before. I never asked, remember?" Piper tried to keep her voice cool. Alex's seemingly being exclusive with her had appeased her somewhat, but Lord knew how curious she had been.

They had been together for five months (already much longer than she had first expected), but it was the first time in her life that she felt a deep bond with someone in such a short amount of time. A leisure walk in the park, or a wall of naughty texts. Holding hands, an innocent kiss. A hot, wild sex, or just simply lying in bed, cherishing the warmth from each other's body. It didn't matter what, how or why it was what it was with Alex, it couldn't have been better for her. She couldn't have wanted it more. She wouldn't want it with anyone else.

Alex smirked as if she had read Piper's mind. "I love you. I really do."

Piper bit her bottom lip, pretending to look away.

"I don't say that to everyone. You have to say it back." Alex nuzzled her nose at the blonde locks, and then nipped at Piper's neck.

"Hey, not fair!" Piper backed away, blushing at the ticklish feeling.

Alex's chuckle sounded soft and raspy at the same time, and Piper loved hearing it. She decided to keep quiet, yearning for more.

"Say it. Please?" Alex stepped in front of Piper, blocking her way. Their grocery bags maintained an undesirable space between them. Alex had that knowing smile, waiting.

Smiling like an idiot, Piper leaned closer to Alex, gazing into the deep, green eyes. Their foreheads touched, and she said, "I love you, too."

_More than you'll ever know._

* * *

><p>People say that love hurt—that it hurt like nothing else. Piper knew that all too well when she walked out of Alex's life. Unfortunately, four years later she still found herself at the exact same spot where she had been. To make matters worse, it seemed that she had trekked deep into the shit hole of this lost world of superheroes. Piper Chapman was in trouble, and she knew it.<p>

Piper groaned, her eyelids fluttering open. Horrible pain reminded her that she was still alive, but definitely unwell.

"She's awake." Polly's voice rang at her right. "She's awake, nurse!"

"I'll call Ms. Claudette now. I'll get her friends here!" Daya said with an enthusiastic tone.

"_I_ am her friend," Polly remarked, rolling her eyes. She then leaned over the bed, beaming at Piper. "Welcome back. How are you feeling?"

"Hey… ah—" Piper's throat was painfully dry, she could barely speak. Polly offered her a cup of water, and she sipped through the straw. "Thank you," she said as she lied back down on the bed.

Polly settled the cup on the bedside table again. "You were out for a whole week. We were worried sick, Piper. Mr. Bloom considered taking you back to the city, but Ms. Claudette insisted that you'd be safer here. The security is much tighter than ever. Everyone is afraid now after what happened to you. I knew it must be Vause and those shady people she was with. I never understood why Litchfield took her back."

Glancing left and right, Piper was aware that she was admitted to the infirmary. She could feel the left side of her face swollen and the nasty sting on her forehead. Her left arm was cast, and possibly she had suffered several broken ribs. Her head was heavy as she tried to register each pain on her body, where it hurt and how bad. Her legs were painful; they hurt so much that she wanted to scream. There must be horrible bruises and cuts everywhere. God, she felt like she had been run over by a truck a dozen times. After a few attempts to clear her mind, she eventually recollected some of the events that had happened.

_The redhead… that night… the lizard and Alex… Alex!?_

Piper shot up in panic, lifting her shoulders for a few seconds before falling back down.

"Jesus! Don't move!" Polly reluctantly pressed a hand on Piper's shoulder. "Stay still!"

_That_..._sounds like a good idea. Fuck_.

Piper inaudibly cried at the pain rippling through her torso. "Alex—" she breathed, "Where's…? What happened? She's… safe? Polly, is—"

"Slow down, Piper." When the blonde didn't try to move again, Polly sat back down. "Vause got it pretty bad. Not counting the injuries you and that freakin' lizard gave her, Ms. Claudette sucked out her life energy to stop her from all the madness she was causing. She's gonna need some serious recovery time if she were to get up and kick some butt again."

Piper froze. She had heard of Ms. Claudette's terrifying powers, and wasn't surprised why the old lady had always kept herself busy in a fairly vacant infirmary. "But… why did she hurt Alex?" Her voice was thin and dry.

"She's in the SHU along with the lizard guy. Well, she had it coming. She almost killed both Ms. Claudette and Jessica that night. She lost control again. She always crossed that fucking line." Polly shook her head exasperatedly. "I hope that Mr. Bloom will get rid of her for good this time. I really don't understand the golden treatment she's getting around here."

Piper found it ironic. 'Golden treatment' was janitorial duties Alex got after Piper beat her up and being sent to the SHU for fighting to save herself. "They put her there… with her conditions like that?" Piper found it difficult to breathe at the thought. It infuriated her. Alex might have lost control over her powers, posing threats to others. But if Alex belonged down there, Piper felt that she did too. "I need to see—ah—" She tried to get up, but her body wouldn't cooperate.

"Jeez, let her rot." Polly shrugged, taking the cup of hot coffee from the bedside table and taking a sip. "Dangerous people like her should be locked away for as long as needed. But knowing Mr. Bloom, he'd probably grow soft on her again. Remember what I told you about him and Vause's mother?"

_Diane Vause_. Piper had met her a few times before. A free-spirited woman with a strong sense of independence and a wild sense of love. Sometimes Piper had felt that Alex was a complete opposite to her mother. Alex had found encouragement in the shady group of people. Alex had hardly followed her heart like Diane had, more guarded and refused to commit. Alex had not believed in love. And it had hurt Piper so deeply that she had felt used in the end.

"Is it as bad as they say it is in the SHU?" Piper's thought was gloomy.

"It is. But don't worry. It's bearable as long as she's not fully conscious. Mr. Bloom will probably let her out soon, or you could talk to him. He's a family, right?" Polly then smirked over her coffee. "Why are you so concerned about her? Is she really just a stranger to you?"

Piper paused at the sudden question. "What—why would you ask—"

"Because you'd been calling out for her in your sleep." Polly laughed at Piper's widened blue eyes.

Piper diligently kept her gaze on the ceiling. "I—uh—we, yes, we were… old friends. We have a strong bond. Good, old friends."

"You beat her up on her first day back, but lied that it was just a misunderstanding. But now you two were good friends? You're a bad liar."

Piper simply sighed in defeat. "I never—no, I didn't expect to see her here or anywhere ever again. It's...complicated. God, it's still a little overwhelming for me. I need some times to let it all cool down."

"What did she do? Was she like a bitch that dated your brother and then dumped him heartlessly? Did she steal your boyfriend? Your money?" Polly's curious gaze was making Piper uncomfortable.

"We broke up four years ago. We were together for only a year, but it was really intense… It didn't end well." Piper decided to admit the truth because she suspected that Polly had already made the right guess.

"A violent reunion." Polly smirked, but quickly stopped. "No. Don't tell me that Nichols knew this before I do. Fuck. She did, didn't she? I'm your roommate, Piper."

"You were gone for two weeks, and Nicky was always around." Piper chortled, but stopped at the growing chest pain. "She's… really a nice... and fun person. You should really give her a chance."

"That's right, Molly. And it's great to see you again, Chapman!" Nicky walked in. She gave a pat on Polly's shoulder, earning a look from the brunette.

Lorna and Bennett followed Nicky in, and they greeted Piper with a warm smile.

Although Piper didn't know those two very well, she smiled back. She was in pain. She was exhausted by just holding a conversation, but she was also very grateful. "Hey... it's good to see you guys too." She was just glad to be alive.

* * *

><p>Alex stabbed the cigarette into the ashtray, exhaling a cloud of smoke. "Is that all? Six names?" She looked over the files on her desk. The gaps between the curtains allowed little sunlight in, and the only source of light in the room was the desk lamp.<p>

There were brief profiles on six people suspected of being 'gifted', but not yet identified and claimed by Litchfield. The targets were the people who acknowledged their powers rather late in life. Alex had learned of her powers' existence at 13, but her 'clients' mostly found it in their thirties or sometimes as late as fifties. They would have a much harder time to adjust to their new lives. They would need a lot of reassurances, a group they truly belonged. They would need a lot convincing and comforts. Alex was just fucking brilliant at her job. She always delivered the goods.

"Gloria Mendoza, 43, two children. Illegal immigrant… Oliver T. Cross, 52, single. An engineer. Liver problems. Ha... Piper Elizabeth Chapman, 23, Smith grad. Hmm. Isn't she cute?" Alex commented as she went over the files. Piper's age had caught her attention. The woman was too young to fit into her usual set of targets, but too old to catch Litchfield's eyes.

"Cute isn't what you're going to find about her. Her powers have been suspected as a telekinesis, a significant ability amongst us. It's even greater if it was channeled properly and for the right purposes."

Alex looked up at Fahri, an Arab man in his mid-forties. A mustached-man, Fahri always looked proper, always in his clean, neat shirt and a pair of slacks, his black shoes polished. "There have been several telekinetic bastards around," Alex commented, shrugging.

"Litchfield always gets to them first, and we never hear about them again."

Alex paused for a second. "What do you mean?"

"It's either they kept them hidden away, or they killed them. A powerful gift can be a dangerous weapon, or a self-destruct one." Fahri walked to the desk and lit up another cigarette for his favorite apprentice.

Alex sucked in a small breath, steadying the burning on the cigarette. She exhaled. "Thanks."

Fahri watched her with attentive eyes. "People don't like it when you become too powerful. Remember that."

Alex never forgot his words. Alex didn't fail to disappoint him.

* * *

><p>Green eyes fought to open, but unlike how it usually failed a thousand times before, Alex could actually focus on the ceiling above this time around. The blueish-white lightbulbs on the dark-colored, plastic ceiling. The air was cold. The bed was hard. The thin blanket that was covering the lower half of her body provided so little warmth that she was shivering, her teeth chattering.<p>

_The SHU… Fuck…_

It wasn't the first time Alex had been in the SHU, but the experiences weren't something she would like to repeat. The room was small, and after spending a few hours in here would make anyone goes claustrophobic. She had gone for weeks or months without interacting with another human being. The only positive thing she could think of at the moment was that whatever drugs they were giving her were doing their jobs fine, keeping the wall of pain at a distance.

Alex tried to move, but was startled to feel some restraints on her wrists. She glanced down to see the thick handcuffs chaining her to the bed. They had never put her under harsh restraints like this before. This looked really bad, and she didn't want to imagine how long they were planning to leave her here. She began to regret, cursing herself for coming back to Litchfield.

Alex breathed hard at the sight of the handcuffs, grunting as she fought against the restraint devices. Fears began to overwhelm her. The more she moved, pain started to come back faster, ripping her from the dreamy state she had been in. But she wanted to move. She needed to move away.

_Now_.

Her mind was a little clearer than it was a moment ago, and Alex took advantage of it. She forced every fiber of her being to act and react—to fight against it. Icy blue began to gloss over her eyes as electric current ran along the length of her arms. She wanted to destroy. She needed to be freed.

"Alex!"

Alex heard the call of her name, but she couldn't quite register where the voice came from. She was sure that she had been alone in this tiny, god-forsaken space. She tried harder to conjure her powers.

"No...! Alex, stop...! Stop it!"

Electric current grew fiercer as the cry for her name grew more desperate.

_'Please, don't hurt me! Please!' _Someone had begged for his life, kneeling before her in the rain. His desperate cries for mercy still echoed in her mind whenever she wasn't careful. But she had been merciless. She had left Litchfield to become someone new—someone competent. But it hadn't been what she had expected at all.

_Shut up... Get out of my head! Just shut up!_

"Alex…! Please, Al, it's me…!"

That voice.

Alex recognized that voice. Her body went stoic and cold. Her powers receded. She couldn't even see the ceiling now. Everything was a blur around her like she was locked behind the wall of thick clouds she had conjured up herself. However, the warmth on her cheek gradually pulled her back to reality. She lied flat on her back again, panting. She was exhausted already from the brief struggle, her whole body shaken.

Alex turned her head slightly, and saw the bluest shade of blue in the eyes she had dearly missed. She must be dreaming. Piper couldn't have been in here, could she? It must have been the drugs they had injected her. She had no complaints now if they would give her more.

"Jeez, I'll come back in a few minutes. I don't fancy being electrocuted in this tiny fucking room. Too close. Just too fucking close. Make it quick, all right? We'd get in so much trouble if they found out."

"Thanks so much, Nicky."

"You owe me one."

_Piper… Nicky…?_

Alex hadn't the best grasp on what was going on. She waited for a few more moments to compose herself. And, there it was, Piper was leaning over the bed, gazing down at her. The blonde looked pretty beaten up herself, bags under the dull eyes, pallid skin and a left arm cast. Piper could barely stand straight. The woman had to lean heavily against the bed.

Icy blue completely vanished, exposing Alex's true green. She smiled groggily. "It's… cold out… for a margarita…"

Piper chuckled. "Don't get cute with me. You almost electrocuted us just a moment ago."

"... weren't supposed... to be here."

Piper's eyes narrowed. "I know that I shouldn't have come." She paused for a moment, and then touched the handcuff around the thin wrist. "But I needed to see if you're all right."

Alex felt her body start to numb again, her mind dazed. It must have been the effects of the drugs. She must have been dreaming. There was no way Piper could be here.

_It's just a dream—a nightmare_.

* * *

><p>Piper was leaning against the bed, looming over the raven-haired woman. Alex had stared at her, but then not. It was clear to her that Alex was still in a drug-induced state.<p>

Alex stared off into the distance, and soon mumbled in her sleep. "Not here... can't..."

Piper gently brushed the dark, sweaty strands of hair away from the pale face. She couldn't believe that she had bothered, risking and breaking more rules, to seek for Alex either. Just three weeks ago, she would never have imagined herself wanting to have anything to do with Alex Vause ever again.

"Alex?" Piper watched as Alex twisted on the bed rather violently. "Hey, I'm here... I'm here now," she cooed. She had to hold her hand tightly in reassurance, and only then that Alex seemed to relax.

Waiting for Alex to fall deeper into slumber exhausted Piper more than she had expected. Piper shifted uncomfortably. The pain on her right leg intensified, and she decided to sit properly along the edge of the bed. She had been moving around too much when she was advised not to leave her bed at all. Hearing from Daya how she got her ass kicked by Mendez, everyone was surprised that she managed to come out of it without life-threatening injuries. The only possible explanation was that Piper had tried to stop herself in the air during the fall from Mendez's grasp down to the roof. Even though she had failed to stop completely, it had helped slowing down the fall.

The thought sent chills down Piper's spine. The nightmare had happened before. It was just another souvenir from a terrible ex.

_Damn you, Alex._

Piper glared down at the sleeping woman, wishing her all the horrible nightmares. After all that they had gone through, she couldn't believe that she still spared even a thought on Alex. And it exasperated her even more to realize that she couldn't stop herself, considering all the things she had done in the past weeks concerning the brunette. Even now that she was cursing Alex in her head, she kept pondering of ways to get the woman out of the SHU. It pained her to see Alex in this state even though she knew that it was for safety reasons, which she had witnessed it for the first time today.

_Lightning._ Piper wondered how Alex had always smelt like a cool breeze all the time, sometimes even freezing. She loved breathing Alex, and now she only understood why. _Shit, I really need to stop thinking..!_ Piper palmed her face. She felt feverish, her body aching badly. Tiredly she sighed and gazed down at Alex once more. _What are you doing to me?_

Then Piper looked up when she heard some movements a short distance away. _Nicky?_ But she froze at the sight of the door slid open, revealing Howard and Red in the brightly lit corridor. The two were in black suits, staring back at her, unimpressed.

_Fuck. I'm fucked…_


	8. Chapter 8

**Note: **I've been writing this story on my mobile. Google seemed to update its words format, the bugs just lost me several progresses in this chapter. Sorry for the delay as I had to rewrite quite a few times. Thanks for all the fav/fol/rev.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 8<strong>

Piper was summoned to Howard's office. Red, her powers training instructor, had also joined the meeting. She didn't particularly want to know what had gone through Howard's mind when he caught her in the SHU. She wondered how he'd interpret the whole thing and translate it to Larry.

_Shit._ Piper realized that it was the first time she'd thought of Larry today. Occupying the chair in front of Howard's desk, with Red to her right, she looked up at Howard. She opened her mouth to speak, but he beat her to it.

"I informed Larry about the attack as soon as I received the news. Throughout the week that you'd been unconscious, I constantly updated him of your progress. As of today, I've already informed him that you have awakened. He asked if he could come see you, but I refused. He'll be waiting for your evening call as usual. I hope that you're feeling well enough to make a phone call."

Piper sensed a hint of sarcasm in his last statement, but decided to ignore it. Howard was right to be suspicious about her behaviors around Alex. And the truth was that Piper felt too ill to be bothered making an excuse. She could barely sit straight on the chair. "Of course, I... I'll make the call. I can't wait to hear from him again. And thank you for letting him know about the attack. I wouldn't want him to go crazy, not knowing why I hadn't contacted him for a week."

"He already went nuts just to learn that you were injured. But that's for another time." Howard cleared his throat, shifting in his seat. "This is the second time you've broken the rules, Piper. I know that it's hard to adjust to this new life. It must be frustrating with this whole superpowers ordeal, the life with limited freedom, being away from family and friends, but you've proven to be unwilling to cooperate. The SHU is off-limit, yet you still went for it. I tried to overlook when you attacked Alex Vause more than a week ago, but you've done it again. Normally if a resident continued to cause problems, they would be sent to the secured unit, and if the problems persisted, they'd be sent to the SHU. I don't want you, or anyone, to go down that road. Surely you've seen what it's like in the SHU."

Piper paused. How could she forget how they strapped Alex down like a wounded, helpless animal? "What does she have to do to be released? I heard that she lost control, and almost hurt other people, but she was just fighting to save herself. I saw her being attacked. She'd be dead by now if I hadn't interfered in time. That lizard monster was insane."

Howard looked even more unimpressed now. "I've just told you the consequences that you might face if you break the rules again, but all you could say is to try to make excuses for Vause?" He sat back, his hands clasped together. "Perhaps I've been too lenient on you."

"What is your relation with Vause?" Red spoke, turning to gaze at Piper.

"Old friends. We had a dispute some years ago, but we're good friends again… Now." Piper knew that she couldn't lie to these two, but in all honesty, she didn't particularly care to convince anyone at the moment. She just wanted to get Alex out of there. "Please, it wasn't entirely her fault. She was attacked. She was forced to use her powers. I know that she failed to control herself, but... I-I think I can stop her. I stopped her in the SHU. The thing is that she needs helps. But being in the SHU just terrified her. It's not helping her. But I can help. I want to help."

Red darkly chuckled. "You cannot even control your own powers very well, young woman."

"I am aware of my shortcomings at times, but I can prove it to you. I am in so much, umm, I'm better in tune with my powers ever since I got here. And I feel that Alex could-"

"Vause had years of trainings, yet she still lost it. Of course, we all slip at times, but never cross the line and harm others." Howard sighed, his face grim. "I know that you mean well, Piper. But we're talking about fatal threats here. It's not only about Vause's powers being one of the risks, but her involvement with a certain syndicate during the past eight years. We know very little about what went on with her during those times. Even her best friend, Nichols, didn't know everything."

"A syndicate?" Piper raced through her mind for some clues from the past, but the increasing headache just made it next to impossible. Slowly she massaged her right temple, trying not to make it too obvious.

"Would you like to rest? We could continue this conversation some other times," Howard said. He did sound genuinely worried for her, and it touched her.

Red leaned closer to Piper, studying her. "The syndicate collects superheroes to work against the government, and ultimately, to ruin Litchfield's purpose to peacefully coexist with ordinary humans. Now I ask you this. Do you know anything about the syndicate? People like George Mendez, the lizard man. How did you become 'good friends' with dangerous, murky kind of people like Vause?"

Her hand lowered to rest on her thigh, Piper blinked at Red, keeping her face calm. "No, I had never met Mendez before that night." She was telling the truth. Alex had mentioned the syndicate she had been involved in, but never in deep details.

But Piper had met someone else from the ring. _Fahri_. She remembered how Alex practically worshipped the dark-skinned man. He was like a brother to Alex, a big influence in her life. Somehow Piper was never fond of him even though they had hung out several times together. He had Alex's life wrapped around his fingers. In the end, whatever love Alex and Piper once shared, Alex had chosen them over her.

Howard cleared his throat before taking a sip of his coffee. "The reason we took Vause back is that we want to keep her close. We need to know our enemy better. But things have escalated much faster than we expected. We thought that Vause came back as a spy, but now it's pretty clear that she's fallen out with them and is wanted dead. But that doesn't automatically make her one of us again. Given her history, she can't be trusted. We only keep her here for precautions. One less member for the syndicate, a lot less problems for us."

Piper just nodded. "Yes… yes, I agree."

Red sent one glance at Howard before reaching out and touching Piper's arm. "The more you can tell us about Vause's involvement with the syndicate, the faster she'd be out of the SHU."

* * *

><p>Piper groaned as sunlight hit her eyes.<p>

Daya had pulled the curtains open, letting in some morning light. "Good morning, Chapman."

"Morning," Piper said reflexively. Was it morning already? She rubbed her eyes with her good hand, trying to recall what happened yesterday. The SHU. The meeting. The deal.

_Fuck. I forgot to call Larry. _Piper remembered leaving Howard's office and went straight back to the infirmary. She found her bed, and the rest of the day was spent on a long, deep slumber. She was too tired to even dream. Yawning, she actually felt a little hungry now. "What time is it?"

"Almost ten," the nurse replied. She moved to Piper's bed and put a small medicine cup on the bedside table. "Two for the pain. If the headache doesn't go away, call for me." She smiled before turning to place another medicine cup on the adjacent table. She glanced back at Piper, and said, "Please remind her to take the pills. She's going to need them when she wakes up."

Piper watched Daya, perplexed, but then froze when the nurse moved away, revealing a sleeping form on the bed next to hers. Someone had been occupying the space. So close, yet too close to see.

Alex groaned in her sleep, possibly irritated by the warm sunlight coming through the windows, pooling over her. She tried to shift away from the source of annoyance, but could hardly move before falling back to the same position again. Perhaps, she had unknowingly moved too much, and the pain stirred her out of slumber. Green eyes fluttered open, staring absentmindedly at the ceiling.

Piper watched the raven-haired woman, mesmerized by those eyes she used to love. She had accepted the deal, and Howard and Red really kept their words and let Alex out of the SHU. She just sighed in pure relief when she saw no restraints on Alex's body.

Slowly Alex turned her head to the side, and halted at the sight of Piper staring back at her.

"Good morning." Piper smiled.

Alex's eyes widened slightly. Her full lips split into a childlike grin, although still groggy and tired. Pink flushed her sickly pale cheeks. "Morning."

Piper cherished the sight before her, grinning from ear to ear. "I need a coffee. I can smell it miles away. Those bastards are having their coffees in the cafeteria. Do you want a coffee?"

"Maybe."

Piper listened to the husky whisper.

"Maybe I need more."

That voice got her every time.

* * *

><p>Piper and Alex spent their day in the infirmary, going over their injury lists. Piper was quite proud of it since it was her first physical fight in her entire life. Even though she got her ass kicked major time, she still felt that she had toughened up somehow. It excited her. It gave her a new sort of energy, a deadly rush she had never felt before.<p>

"It was crazy. I thought he broke your neck or something," Alex said. She was leaning back against the stack of pillows, already a novel in her hands, borrowed from Ms. Claudette's collections. Although her voice was calm, Piper could catch the understated anger, but decided to ignore it.

"A lot of people thought so too. Well, it must have been my sub-consciousness or something. I must have destroyed the roof somehow without knowing it."

"Jeez, Pipes, it was my lightning that destroyed it. Ego much?"

A moment of silence passed. Piper stared across the small space between their beds. "You struck the roof? You struck it while I was up there?"

Alex lowered the book to her lap. "I had to get him off you somehow, right?"

"You could have killed me then! No, thank you!"

"But it worked. I saved your ass." Alex giggled, but then coughed through it.

"Your ego is astounding. I have no words for it."

"So now it's my fault? Something never changed." Alex rolled her eyes.

Piper shook her head. "Oh, I've changed a lot. You'll be surprised." She then gestured at the bandages around her legs and feet. "For instance, those are war wounds. Just imagine. Now I've got the coolest story to tell. Piper Elizabeth Chapman fought the lizard monster!"

Alex chuckled as she returned to her reading. "I'm not sure if your fiancé would be thrilled to hear that."

Piper glanced at Alex. She can't tell if Alex was just joking or being sarcastic. It did disappoint her that Alex could mention Larry without much thought. Piper berated herself. What did she expect? Did she want Alex to feel jealous like when she thought of Fiona or Jessica?

"Alex!" Jessica marched in through the doors. The bruises on her face looked better now. Her blonde hair had returned to being silky and straight. Piper bet that it smelled nice too, and unconsciously she touched her own messy, blonde locks.

"Hey, Jess." Alex smiled lightly as Jessica came to sit at the edge of her bed.

Quickly, Piper grabbed the iPad on her bedside table and pretended to be using it.

"I heard that they let you out of the SHU today. How are you feeling? I couldn't believe that they put you in there while you were badly injured! I tried talking to Mr. Healy, but he wouldn't listen. He was just so thrilled to bust you. Thank God that Mr. Bloom got back yesterday. He saved you from that wretched place." Jessica wasn't even trying to hide the concerns in her eyes and voice. She placed a palm over Alex's forehead, and sighed in relief when Alex's fever hadn't been too bad.

Alex mustered a dry smile. "At least I was unconscious for most of the lock up. I didn't even know I was there. Anyway, I've been to the SHU before, so it's nothing new."

Alex might have put up a nonchalant façade, but Piper could still catch the hint of dread in those green eyes. Surely Alex remembered how scared she was in the SHU. Being restrained in a confinement such as that would terrify anyone. Then she wondered if Alex remembered her brief visit-if the woman knew that she cared.

"In fact, you sent me there the first time, remember?" Chuckling, Alex brushed her nose with the back of her hand.

Piper frowned, whilst keeping her gaze on the iPad. Alex had runny nose. Did Alex catch a cold?

Jessica stiffened at the mention, and then both of them burst out fits of giggles. Alex, however, had to stop soon as she put a hand on her left rib. "You started it, Alex! You put a roach in my soup!"

Alex rolled her eyes, lowering her hands to her lap, playing with the book. "It was just a roach. Thanks to you. At sixteen, I was the youngest person ever to go to the SHU."

"Well, I'm sorry." Jessica's apology took Piper by surprise, and Piper involuntarily looked up. "I didn't know that Mr. Healy would go that far. He really hates your guts."

"Don't I know that," Alex muttered, and then glanced at Piper's way.

Their gazes locked, and Piper panicked. "What?" She sounded more curt than she had intended.

Jessica growled at Piper. "We saved your ass that night, Chapman. You should be thanking us."

"Thank you, Your Highness."

Alex muffled her laugh, looking away when Jessica scowled at her.

"Can you be serious for once?" Jessica chastised Alex with an intense stare, and Piper didn't like it one bit.

Jessica then turned her attention back to Piper. "So much troubles have happened ever since you moved here, Chapman. What's with you and the lizard guy? You got Alex injured, almost killed, and then sent her to the SHU for trying to save you."

Piper looked at Alex, who stiffened at once.

"It's not her fault. Mendez was here for me, not Piper," Alex explained.

"But you lost control, trying to save her, because she couldn't defend herself. Then you got punished for it. How many more times this has to happen?" Jessica crossed her arms across her chest.

Piper paused. They had told her that Alex had lost control and had almost hurt Ms. Claudette and Jessica, but not the reason that caused it. "What do you want? An apology? Will that erase the week in the SHU?" She sighed in frustration, clutching the blanket over her legs. She'd be the last person on earth to want to see Alex being chained like an animal, but she was as powerless as Alex was, with or without the chains.

Alex adjusted her glasses, looking away.

"What I meant was that you should stay away from Alex. She kept getting into serious troubles whenever you're around. Get well soon. Learn fast. So you could leave Litchfield and get back to your fiancé."

As much as Piper hated Jessica's tone of voice, she decided not to respond. She kept quiet for another two hours until Jessica left the infirmary. By then, her iPad had run out of battery. She grumbled, making a mental note to tell Polly to leave the charger here next time.

"Hey," Alex whispered, sipping water through a straw. She sounded tired after a long chat. Piper honestly thought that Jessica had tried too hard.

Piper loudly groaned as she moved her legs to the more comfortable positions.

"I'm sure Jess didn't mean to sound as harsh. She doesn't have the friendliest manners as you can see."

"It's cool, Alex. It's great to see you get along so well with the ice princess. I can't careless what she says or thinks about me. Don't worry." Piper winced at the pain as she rolled to her side, facing away from Alex. She recalled all the mean laughs and cruel jokes Jessica used to make of Alex at the dinning table. People had strange ways to conceal their true feelings, indeed.

_My feelings… _Piper irritably sighed, trying to brush the thought away. "You lost control because of me?" she asked before she could stop herself.

A long silence. "I thought you were dead."

Piper shut her eyes, embracing the fact that Alex had cared about her. Alex still cared so much that it scared and excited her at the same time. And she felt bad. She felt guilty, knowing that she shouldn't have any of these thoughts or feelings when she was already engaged.

"I lost control, but it's really my fault. Don't let them tell you otherwise."

Piper couldn't help it. She smiled foolishly, knowing that Alex couldn't see it.

"I'm sorry that I'd tried to lead you astray years ago. But this is where you truly belong, where you'll be safe. Litchfield is your home, Pipes." The words came soft, and they effortlessly stopped Piper's world.

With some difficulties, Piper looked over her shoulder to see the watchful, green eyes behind the pair of black-rimmed glasses. "What about you? Is it your home too?"

Alex shrugged. "I've burnt my bridges one after another. I don't know what it's going to be."

But Piper knew the answer very well. Alex would leave Litchfield. The fact that Mendez found her here was no accident. Alex knew that she wasn't safe here, and the residents probably didn't feel as safe either. "Where are you going to go? Do you have any supports or protections out there? Any relatives? Anyone?"

Alex sighed, but with a jaded smile. "I'm pretty much on my own."

"I think Mr. Bloom can help you."

"Fuck, Pipes. I'm never gonna ask for his money."

Piper sat up, concern in her eyes. "I meant that he might be able to help you with places to rent. But what, Alex? You don't have any money? What happened to your savings? Last time you told me that there were at least two millions."

Piper remembered those luxurious trips and fancy dinners Alex used to take her to. She had some idea of what Alex's work was, involving the syndicate that recruited superheroes, but she never knew where the money came from. She thought it was likely dirty money. And if she was given another chance now, she would have said 'no' to those adventurous offers. She was young, reckless and selfish. She was in love with the wrong person, turning at every wrong turns. Yes, the fact that she was lying in bed, sick as fuck, should have confirmed her that the love they shared was never meant to be. What they had wasn't real.

"I spent all of it. I'm pretty fucked." Alex ran her hand through her hair.

Piper didn't ask any further. She didn't want to think of Alex spending it all on other women.

Then Alex carefully got up. Her breathing was a little ragged, her movements sluggish. Sitting by the edge of the bed, she took a moment to breathe, brushing her hair from her face.

"Where are you going?" Piper didn't like the idea of Alex moving too much, fearing the woman would end up hurting herself again.

"I have to make a phone call. I haven't called mom for over a month. She must be really worried."

"Diane...?" Piper blinked. "Your mom is alive?"

"Of course." Alex looked perplexed.

Piper groaned in exasperation. "What the fuck, Alex!? You told me Diane died the day we broke up. You were crying!"

It took Alex a moment before she slapped her forehead. "Crap."

Piper's jaw dropped. "Who fucking lied about their mother's death? Why the hell did you do that!?"

"I… I didn't want you to leave." Mumbling, Alex scratched the back of her neck.

Blue eyes were wide, Piper shook her head. "I cannot believe this. Alex, were you mad?"

"I was madly in love with you. I couldn't stand you leaving. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have lied." Alex looked down, biting her bottom lip. Hands balled on her lap, she looked like a child being caught in a naughty act.

Looking away, Piper couldn't help but sigh. She wanted to scold at the woman more, but she just couldn't. "God, Al, what else did you lie to me?"

* * *

><p>It was almost eight in the evening when Alex finally made her way down the corridor, careful with each step. She was wearing a gray jacket over her thin, blue hospital gown. Her white slippers made little sounds as she walked. She felt tired, her body aching, but she had been put to sleep for the whole of last week, and she just wanted to stay awake for as long as she could.<p>

Alex put her hands in her jacket pockets. In truth, she was just afraid to go back to sleep, fearing that she might wake again in the SHU.

'_What else did you lie to me?'_

The question kept echoing in her head. Alex hadn't replied, and Piper hadn't talked to her again for the rest of the day. She had lied so much in her life that she couldn't quite remember what and when. And she didn't expect Piper to believe her now. As dire as it may sound, she felt that it was the way it was supposed to be for them. Whatever feelings that their reunion had provoked were just remnants of their old flame. It was a dying fire. Nothing more.

Alex walked into the empty canteen. Three vending machines stood to the right. A pair of black couches, and a few sets of round tables and chairs were arranged to the left. Two phone booths were at the far back. Luckily, she didn't have to go all the way back to the South Mansion to make a call.

Sitting down at one of the booths, Alex swiped the card. She had borrowed the phone credits from Nicky a week ago. She dialed, and waited.

"Alex!?"

Alex smiled to hear her mother sounding as healthy and fierce as usual. "I'm sorry I disappeared. Are you ok?"

"I'm fine! Are _you_ ok, baby? You had me worried sick!"

Alex glanced over her shoulder, scanning the empty area. "How are you holding up? Do you follow my instructions?"

"My name is Katherine Sumner. No supermarkets. No appointments. No calls. Online orders only. If I must, leaving apartment only after dark, and only for a short amount of time. Never talk to anyone. What is going on?" Diane sounded distraught.

"It's for your safety. I'm sorry that you have to go through this."

"What kind of trouble are you in? This seems to be very serious. Are you really ok? Are you hurt?"

Alex put her glasses up over her head and pinched the bridge of her nose. "I'm fine. I can take care of myself. But you must be careful, mom. It can get very dangerous."

"You haven't told me what's going on. Is it the men you worked for? It must be them. What did you do, Alex?" Diane pressed on.

Alex held back a sigh. "I… I screwed up. Look, I'm so, so sorry that this has to happen, but please, just hold on until things clear up. You still got the money, right?"

"What exactly can I spend two millions on? Online grocery shopping? I can't even leave the apartment." Diane growled. "Where did you get so much money anyway? Did you kill people for it?"

Alex rolled her eyes. "My job was good. I was a valuable employee."

"What happened, really, _Alex Vause_? I demand the truth." Diane stressed, letting her daughter know that she was serious.

There was a long moment of silence before tears welled up the green eyes. Alex clutched the phone to her ear with both hands. She was scared for her mom and herself, and now Piper was pulled into this shit too. She was lonely. And she felt guilty for what happened to Fiona. The girl didn't deserve such a fate. She was a bad omen to everyone around her.

"I fell in love with the wrong person, and it got me stuck. I'm stuck in this deep shit, mom, and I don't know how to get out of it." Alex clung to the phone as if she could feel her mom's warmth through it. "I'm not gonna lie to you. It's gonna be a long while before all of this is over. Just... know that I miss you."

"I don't like the sound of this. Alex, please tell me—"

"Hang in there, mom. Everything will be fine. You just have to trust me." Alex steadied her voice, and eventually earned a sigh from her mother.

"I love you," Diane said.

"I love you, too. Take care." Alex hung up. Her hand clung to the receiver for a moment before she let go. Kubra would never let her go, and only now real fears had caught up with her. With Fiona dead, she feared for the worst for her mother.

_It's all my fault._

Alex buried her face in her palms. She didn't even know when she would be able to see her mother again. The future looked bleak now that time was pressing. Not only that Kubra's faction was daring enough to invade Litchfield, she felt that her welcomed stay had soon run out with all the incidents happening around her. She might need to call a few contacts to borrow some money to make another escape plan. She had given most of her savings to Diane, and some to Fiona.

_I guess I could call—_ Alex flinched at the blanket coming down and covering her shoulders. She looked up and saw Piper standing behind her.

"It's cold in the canteen. They don't turn on the heater. And... I thought that your jacket is too thin," Piper said, briefly looking away.

"It's one of a few belongings I left here from years ago. I'll have to live with it." Alex stood up, clutching the edge of the blanket. She smiled earnestly at the blonde. "Thanks. But you really shouldn't be moving, Pipes. Your legs are pretty badly hurt."

Piper made a face as she glanced down at the bandages. "Yeah, they hurt like hell when I walk."

Alex chuckled. She found a grumbling Piper adorable. Before she could stop herself, she reached out and wrapped her arm around Piper's waist. To her surprise, Piper let her.

They walked out into the dark corridor, Piper leaning heavily against Alex for support. They headed back to the temporary female ward on the first floor. They knew that they couldn't afford to ruin more rooms now, or they'd be sleeping in the backyard next time.

"I know that I shouldn't like how it feels to have you so close to me, but I really do." Alex was the first to break the silence that was hanging over their agonizingly slow walk through the corridor. She shouldn't have said it, but she said it in hopes that Piper would break away—push her away, because she wouldn't be able to do that herself. "I even dreamt of you last night," Alex muttered, turning her head to kiss Piper's temple. The blonde didn't react. Blue eyes continued to stare down at the floor. "Or… was it the night before? I don't really know. It was a blur to me. I only remember seeing you in the dream."

"It wasn't a dream." Piper finally spoke. "I asked Nicky to get me into the SHU. I needed to see you." She had then stopped walking, pulling Alex to a halt too.

Alex frowned in disbelief. "You sneaked into the SHU…? Were you crazy!? Do you realize what would happen if they caught you guys—" But she was interrupted by a pull at the blanket, propelling her forward to meet with a pair of warm lips against her own. Their hot breaths mingled, and Piper shuddered against her.

Alex stood still for a moment, studying the heavy, blue gaze that was fixed upon her lips. Piper leaned in closer again. Piper wanted more, and Alex did the stupidest thing she could imagine; she snaked a hand behind Piper's neck, pulled her in and kissed her back equally fervent and needy. Eyes closed, she could hear Piper calling out, whispering her name between their mad, urgent kisses.

It was just like the dreams in those dark, cold nights during the confinement. It was just a dream. Piper had always been a dream to her.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

They were just kisses. They weren't supposed to mean much. But Piper knew it was _something_ when she went to bed and dreamt about it, longing for more, waking up this morning, tensed and wet. She was unsure if it was her true feelings or just her needs after being in Litchfield for almost a month without physical intimacy with anyone. She wouldn't know how to keep a calm façade next time she'd phone Larry. She just felt horribly guilty for having dreamt about it.

"I can't do this, Red. I'm sorry. I guess I'm not cut for it."

"Well, then, I guess we'll just have to put her back in the SHU," Red said with her heavy Russian accent, shrugging slightly. She was sitting behind her desk, a cup of coffee in her hand.

Piper mentally groaned. Her legs were so sore, her feet swollen, due to the walk from the infirmary for this meeting. "No, please, it—it wasn't her fault—"

"She posted threats. She is dangerous."

Piper wanted to wipe that smirk off Red's face, but decided against it. "You can't do that to her. Locking her up again will only make it worse. Please, Red, there must be other way."

Red shook her head. "We had a deal. We only released her from the SHU because you promised to keep an eye on her."

"Spy. You wanted me to spy on her. But I don't think it's going to work."

"Why not? You were so confident yesterday that you could keep her powers in check, that she trusts you enough. What happened?" Red spoke over her coffee.

"N—nothing happened. I just think that she's—"

Red's eyes suddenly widened, and she burst out laughing, almost spilling the coffee. "You two kissed!?"

It wasn't really a question, but a statement. Piper blushed hotly as Red continued to laugh. "You read my mind!? I thought you said that you don't read minds unless it's absolutely necessary!"

"But you kept thinking about it over and over again. Your thoughts were very loud. I couldn't help it." Red rested her cheek on her palm, watching Piper with a motherly smile.

Piper looked down for a second. "It was just a slip. Please don't tell anyone about this."

"I would never talk about other people's private thoughts. But surely… you've been working diligently on her."

"Please, stop!" Piper's ears were burning now.

Red chuckled, putting the coffee down on the desk. "Whatever you do, young woman, keep your head clear, or you might end up being used again. Vause is like a snake. She'll end up biting you, not because she hates you, but it's just who she is."

Piper stopped, lost in her thoughts. Seeing how vulnerable Alex had been the past weeks, Piper hardly saw her as a predator anymore. Alex needed help more than ever. "Why don't you read Alex's mind to find out more about the syndicate? That way I don't have to spy on her."

_I just can't be near her. Bad, bad idea_. Piper cursed herself.

"I tried reading her and Mendez while they were drugged, but their memories were very disoriented and fragmented. It's difficult to read when the person is asleep or in an unhealthy state. The clearest reading would be current thoughts like you were having."

"Alex would be awake soon," Piper suggested.

"A trained person like Vause would know instantly if I try to get into her head. And she would distrust us. Now we have a better idea. _You_. You can get closer to her than the rest of us. You two fought for each other. She must have some level of trust on you. It should be an easy job for you."

Piper sat still. She didn't want to imagine how others had perceived her relationship with Alex. It must have looked bad particularly in Howard's eyes. "But I'm new here. Aren't you afraid that I might side with her and betray you instead?"

Red stared at her, and Piper immediately stiffened. "Were you two just good friends, I don't think you need to answer that. Howard and I trust you on this, because we feel that you really want to help Vause. She's too involved with them. Without Litchfield, she's going to get dragged back into whatever mess she had been in, and next time there's no guarantee that she'll make it out alive. Everyone needs some supports, Piper. She needs your help."

_She needs me…? _Piper pondered about Alex's phone conversation with Diane last night. Alex was obviously on a run, and the matter seemed serious enough that she had to relocate her mother for safety reasons. It ached Piper's heart to see Alex with her head down, cornered and beaten. She was torn between her loyalty to Larry and her damning need to keep Alex safe.

* * *

><p>"Why are you smiling like an idiot?"<p>

Alex looked up from her lunch tray on the overbed table. "What?"

"I said you were smiling like an idiot." Nicky, sitting on the edge of Piper's bed, patted her hand over the crumpled, white sheet. "Where did she go?"

"No idea. She's already gone when I woke up."

Nicky narrowed her eyes. "Did something happen last night? Is that why you were smiling like a crazy bitch?"

"No, I wasn't smiling." Alex picked up a biscuit from the plate. "Want some? It's quite good."

"You're lame, Vause. Come on, what happened?"

Alex raised her brows, biting the biscuit. "She kissed me," she said with a mouthful.

Nicky grinned from ear to ear. "Must be one hell of a kiss to get Alex Vause all dreamy! Did you kiss her back?"

"...kind of." Alex thought of the heat their bodies radiating during those crazy moments their lips clashed. It was almost intolerable. It amazed her that they were able to break apart and went to bed without going further, their injuries being a big reason for it.

Nicky laughed, slapping her knee. "Fucker. So what is it? Are you two back together now, or was it just caught in a moment thing?"

"I think she just missed her fiancé," Alex said, trying to convince herself so. She shouldn't get her hopes up. She shouldn't dwell on it.

"Ouch."

Alex just shrugged. "Hey, Jess told me about a girl leaving the South. You think you could get me that room? I don't want to sleep in the lounge when I get out of here. After everything that's happened around me, they'd probably try to murder me in my sleep."

"Jess? Who's Jess?"

"Jessica Wedge."

Nicky went silent for a moment before her eyes twinkled. "Seriously, Vause!? I thought she hated your guts!"

"She still does." Alex smirked.

"All right, man. All right, I give it to ya!" Nicky chuckled. "Yeah, Mercy is getting out tomorrow. It should be vacant, if no one else's snatched it already. I'll talk to Red about the room."

_Red_. Everyone knew how terrifying a mind reader could be. It wasn't their superpower abilities, but one's own secrets that made 'the gift' so threatening. Alex had no doubt that Red must have tried reading her memories, while she was locked up in the SHU. But it would be a silly trip. She was rather certain that Red hadn't gotten much out of it.

"Hey, now, Red is good," Nicky said. She knew what Alex was thinking by just looking at her.

Alex's eyes narrowed in contempt. "She tried to get to my head while I was unconscious. She was all over the place, Nicky. She was fucking everywhere. I can still feel her presence in my dreams last night. I hate it when she does that, walking all over in my fucking head."

Nicky's mouth popped in awe. "You could tell even though you were drugged? Some trainings you got from those people."

"They helped me become stronger than Litchfield would ever make me. They're scared of me." Alex thought back to those early years with Fahri. At times she wondered how different her life would be if she had never joined the syndicate. She had strayed too far to come back now, hadn't she?

Nicky studied her for a long moment. "What did you do? You killed for them?"

Alex had to look away at Nicky's unusually solemn tone. There had been incidents. There had been accidents. Sometimes the line was so blurred that she wasn't sure what to think anymore.

Nicky sighed. "You're home now, Vause. Maybe we should talk."

"About what? They already knew years ago that I worked for Kubra. It's nothing new."

Shaking her head, Nicky chewed her toothpick. "Don't sound so cold. Mr. Bloom was very disappointed when you left. It's a good thing that he still welcomes you back. Not to mention that he let you out of the SHU on the first day he got back from Germany. He's like a father to us all. And you know that, in your heart, that's why you came back."

Alex remained silent. She knew how her friend had always looked up to Red and Howard as parental figures, given Nicky's problems with her mother since young age. It was the case for many residents here as well.

Then the two looked up when Polly entered. "Hey, guys." The petite brunette greeted, and moved to Piper's bedside table.

Alex watched Polly collect the iPad, the gray scarf and the crimson, wool sweater. "Why are you taking them? Where's Piper?"

"She's feeling much better today, so she's moving back to the dorm. I'm here to help her get her things. Her legs are still pretty bad."

"What? So fast, huh?" Nicky raised a brow, biting down the toothpick.

Polly put Piper's belongings into her bag and turned to smirk at Alex. "Get well soon." Then, she walked off, leaving the duo dumbstruck.

Alex leaned back against the pillows. She couldn't believe it. It was only a kiss. Well, kisses. Hot, needy kisses. But it hurt like a bitch that Piper decided to just up and leave. There had been no words exchanged between them since they kissed last night. They had returned to bed, watching each other from their beds until they fell asleep. Last night was like a dream; hectic, exciting but silent. But today the blonde had sent her friend to get her things, clearly not wanting to see Alex or bothering to explain.

"What the fuck was that about? Ah, man. Straight girls. They'll fuck you up every time." Nicky groaned. She then leaped from Piper's bed to sit at Alex's blanketed feet instead. She grabbed the peeled orange from the lunch tray and gobbled up. "But, hey, she really cared about you," she added.

Alex whipped her glasses up to rest atop her head, squinting out the window. "Fuck her."

Nicky leaned over the overbed table. "She begged me to take her to the SHU just to see you. I'd never dare, if she didn't look like she was about to have a nervous breakdown. She didn't even think of the consequences if she were caught, which by the way, she was."

Alex stopped. "... She was caught?"

"Yeah, but you know, being Mr. Bloom's daughter-in-law has its perks. She also got me off the hook!"

"Howard is not yet her father-in-law." Alex responded too fast for her own liking, and she had to look away. She groaned as she threw her head back, staring up at the ceiling. "Fuck. Why am I the only person who got punished around here?"

Nicky laughed, but her gaze was searching. "Because you left us, Vause. Don't ever do that again."

Alex inwardly sighed. _I wish_.

* * *

><p>"Marry me."<p>

The phone pressed to her right ear, Piper briefly shut her eyes. Her cast, left arm suddenly felt very itchy. "Larry, I'm sure you know that this isn't a good time. We've been over this."

"But you've been attacked. You almost died, Piper! You almost died on that island, and I couldn't even go see you! It's like you don't even exist anymore. I can't reach you." Larry heavily sighed into the phone. "I can't do this. I don't want to lose you... Do you?"

Piper's grip on the phone tightened. No, she didn't want to change. She didn't want to lose herself. She missed the extravagant parties. She missed her friends and their harmless gossips. Their brunches and yoga classes. Just by hearing Larry's voice, the days of her ordinary life came rushing to her. Those lively, carefree days when she never got hurt, or hurt anyone.

But then there was another world beyond the life she had led. And it was as real as it was going to get. It was Litchfield and its people. It was something Larry would never be a part of—a life even her own family would never understand.

"I don't know how to explain it. I'm… I guess you're right. I'm in another world completely. There've been really scary situations here, but at the end of the day they're people... like me. And I am like them. It's gonna sound crazy, but… I think I truly belong here."

Larry scoffed in disbelief. "You've been there for only about a month, Piper. You're saying that you know them more than me? That you connect with them more than me? That is ridiculous! Is this why you don't want to get married now? No. No, I don't—no, I don't buy it. Is... Is there someone else, Piper?"

The thought of the kisses last night abruptly hit her, and Piper felt a huge pang of guilt hanging over her head. "Larry… No, that's not what I meant," Piper said, looking out the window to the beautiful view of sunset in the front yard of the North. Her gaze trailed to the small building next to the Gym; the infirmary, first floor. Where had her heart gone when she was stuck in a telephone booth, discussing her uncertain future?

Piper took a deep breath in and continued. Her voice was tired, her mind exhausted. "Larry, I'm a freak. The things that I've done here, you'd be terrified to know. If you get to see the people here, you'd be scared too. I don't think you're going to like it. Not at all. You didn't sign up for this. I'm so sorry."

"I'm not scared of you, Piper. Never. I love you, you know that." His tone softened, and Piper bit her bottom lip. "You'll leave that place one day. You can't live there forever."

"Some people do."

"Do you—" Larry groaned in frustration. "Do you still love me?"

Piper frowned. "What are you talking about? Of course, I do."

"Then take the ferry tomorrow! We'll fly to Vegas the next flight available. I don't even care about the ceremony or—or the guests now. Just the two of us."

Rocking on her chair, Piper mentally slapped herself in the face. "God, I'm not going to repeat myself again. I'm not allowed to leave the island. If you really want our wedding to go through, maybe you should talk to your dad about it."

"That's the idea! He's leaving Germany today. So I'll be able to catch him tomorrow sometimes in the afternoon, I guess. I'm gonna have a serious talk with him, and I'll tell you later how it goes."

"Yeah… yeah, ok," Piper muttered.

It appeared that Howard's family didn't know that he'd been back for at least two days now. Piper wondered how many more things Howard had been keeping from his family all these years. She wondered if she would have to keep things from Larry too after they married. In just a little less than a month here, she already felt that she'd experienced things that she'd never be able to share with him.

* * *

><p>The temporary female ward was empty tonight. Ms. Claudette took a few days leave for business outside of Litchfield. Daya was supposed to be on watch tonight, but Alex insisted that she'd be fine, letting the nurse go on a date with Bennett. It was Nicky again who had sneaked them out of the island. When Lorna asked to tag along, they then decided to go on a double date. Alex could only silently grumble at her misfortune. She was still too ill to leave, and the thought of Piper avoiding her since morning just pissed her off.<p>

The other patients had already moved back to their dorms. There were some male patients left, but they were upstairs. It was awfully quiet on the first floor.

_Fuck it._

Alex pulled open the drawer and fished out a pack of cigarettes Nicky had left this afternoon. Grabbing the lighter, she put on her gray jacket and made her way out of the building. Quickly, she found an empty bench some distance away from the entrance.

Alex exhaled the first puff, and sighed in content. She had quit smoking twice during the past six years, but always gave in to cravings. She took another puff, and exhaled the plume of smoke up, staring at the starry sky. It was a very clear night, the air getting colder. It was almost December.

"A beautiful night, isn't it?"

Alex paused. She remembered the voice without having to turn around to see who it was. "It is," she mumbled.

Howard was wearing a blue sweater and a pair of khakis. He sat down next to her, smoking his pipe. Alex had returned to Litchfield while Howard was still away in Germany. It was the first time they had the chance to meet properly.

"Your return had taken me by great surprise. I am still undecided how to feel about it. What to do, or how to deal with you," Howard said. "You can imagine how shocked and displeased some were. Sometimes I am convinced that your true powers is to confuse and damn people."

Alex took another drag. "I'm not surprised that Healy is still at it. Some people don't ever change. Well… thanks for getting me out of the SHU."

Howard kept quiet for a moment. "Healy went too far, yes. And I wouldn't want to see an old friend locked up in there. It was a terrible thing to witness."

Alex raised a brow. "We're still friends after all the shit that went down?"

"Of course, or else I'd have Healy throw you out of Litchfield on your first day back. Your optimism has always intrigued me." Howard looked the other way. "I assume that you're in trouble. Is your mother safe?"

Alex stiffened at the mention of Diane.

Howard turned to look at her, his gaze deadly serious. "If something happens to her, Alex, I will personally—"

"Fuck you. You have no rights." Alex took in the last drag and stabbed the cigarette into the ground. "I repaid every cent for her surgeries. You have no rights to even ask about her now." She lit up another cigarette and let out an angry puff of smoke.

"It was never about the money."

"It was to me. To _us_."

Howard adjusted his glasses a little. "I understand how you feel, but what Diane and I had—"

"You had nothing. She never loved you. Don't you get it? And she'd have hated you if she knew what you'd done."

"Might I remind you that you consented? And if you dare telling your mother otherwise, I swear that you'd regret it." Howard spoke so calmly that it hardly sounded like a threat, but Alex knew this man better than most people out there. She kept her cool face and the steady tone of voice, but her muscles tensed, readying to retreat if needed. Given her frail condition, some distance away from him would make a safer ground for her. Her lightning might not come fast enough when he got angry.

"I regretted ever accepting your help. You specifically asked me to join his faction as a way to repay the debts. 'For Litchfield'. 'For your people'. Remember? I was nineteen, and stupid enough, I did it. But I repaid you in cash too. So you don't get to fucking talk about my mom anymore. Fuck you."

Howard watched her for a long moment, and his contemplative gaze unnerved her. Alex had to look away, taking in another drag. "You probably won't believe anything I say now, but I want you to know that there hasn't been a day that I did not regret sending you away. I miscalculated it, and we lost you… for a long time." He then stood up, puffing out smoke from his pipe. "I shouldn't expect you to ever accept what Diane and I had. It's terribly unfair to ask of you. For that, I am truly sorry. If you… if there is anything that I can be of help, please do not hesitate to come to me. I'll never ask anything from you in return again. Stay safe... and welcome home, Alex."

Alex only looked up again when Howard walked away, disappearing into the dark, narrow path leading to the North Mansion. It took her by surprise that Howard actually wanted her to stay. She had always been bitterly curious about her mother's relationship with Howard. She had a vague idea of what it was, but had never dared to ask for details. It'd hurt too much—too deep.

_Welcome home._ Howard's words echoed in her head, but Alex wasn't sure if Litchfield was still the home she once had.

Alex gazed up at the North's second floor, searching for the window at the end of its east wing. She spotted it. The room was largely dark, partially lit by moonlight. But there was a set of shadowy figure moving about the window. The figure then had stopped moving, standing facing the moon. Alex was certain then that it was staring back at her, watching her from the dark.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

Two weeks after her return to Litchfield, there was finally a peaceful sense of homecoming for Alex. With a black bag in one hand, she entered the vacant room last occupied by a former resident, Mercy. Unlike the rooms in the North, rooms in the South were much smaller with enough space for only a single bed and a set of desk and chair. Dusty, cracked, narrow walls that could make one goes claustrophobic, much like the SHU, but better only with a tall window provided.

Alex wasn't complaining. She must admitted that she had missed this place more than she had imagined. Even with the damp air and tiny space. The loud, rude chatters in the graffiti-walled hallways. She put her bag, which contained some clothes and other personal belongings, down on the floor, and sat down on the creaky bed. She had stayed in the infirmary for the past week, waiting until Red finally gave her Mercy's room. It was far from the fancy apartment she used to rent, but she was just grateful for the privacy right now. At least she didn't have to sleep in a public place like the lounge or staying in the infirmary like a homeless.

Lorna followed Alex into the room, a set of creamy-colored sheets and a folded blanket in her hands. "You might wanna change the bed sheet and pillowcases. Here they are, and my spare blanket for you. Not brand new, but washed and clean. Nicky told me to prepare them for you when you move in."

Alex got up to take them from Lorna. "Thanks. Really appreciate it." She smiled. Lorna had been very kind and sweet to her.

"Nicky and I will go out for a dinner tonight. Would you like to come with us?" Lorna asked.

"I'll be fine. Don't wanna be the third wheel." Chortling, Alex began to pull the old bed sheet off.

"You can bring Wedge with us. She's been visiting you every day at the infirmary. A double date is cool." Lorna smiled knowingly, leaning against the doorframe.

Alex carefully bent over the bed and spread the new bed sheet over it. Her thoughts instead mulled over a certain blonde who hadn't bothered to visit her at all during the past week. Why was Piper so threatened by their kisses that the woman had literally run away? It wasn't the first time they had kissed. Far from it. But Alex knew better to resign. Perhaps it would be unfair to expect Piper to be the same, seeing as the woman was now committed in a serious relationship.

Alex sighed. "Yeah, I'll ask. I don't think she's gonna come though. I'll let you know later. I'm going back to trainings today, thanks to Red. She doesn't think that I'm in control of my powers after the incident. Damn. I'll be like the oldest student in there." She grumbled as she changed the pillowcases.

Lorna smiled sweetly. "Nicky still goes. I do, sometimes. A lot of people do, old and new. Our powers can go wonky just about any day, so we have to keep it in check." She knocked on the wall lightly and walked away. "Catch ya later, Vause."

Alex quietly nodded. She was feeling much better now even though she still needed to take some medications. But the exhaustion persisted. She hadn't much sleep at all, knowing that she wasn't safe anywhere. Fiona's death and Mendez's attack had deeply shaken her. She had been sleeping with one eye open, and dedicated all three phone calls allowed per day to her mother. She would do everything to keep Diane safe. Anything.

* * *

><p>"You're asking me out?" Jessica raised a brow, her slender arms across her chest. "On a double date with that disgusting Nichols and her psychotic, little slut? You're kidding, Alex."<p>

Inside the large Gym 1, four lines were formed, each with an eighteen-foot tall robot as their target. Alex and Jessica were queuing in the second line. They were in their blue jumpsuits for trainings. Jessica faked an ice incident during dinner yesterday, giving her a sound reason to attend trainings today without her friends growing more suspicious. Perhaps they were already suspicious, but it wasn't as if Jessica could help it.

"Nicky is my friend. Watch your mouth. And Lorna is a sweet girl."

Jessica rolled her eyes. "That bitch keeps saying that she's dating Christopher, while in fact she's imagining things. Chris is my friend. He told me everything. He said that she's absolutely insane. A stalker! You better be careful, Alex. Don't surround yourself with crazy bitches."

Alex just shrugged, not really interested in the topic. "I'll take it as a 'no' then." She secretly moped about having dinner alone again. She just wasn't used to being single at all.

"I cannot be seen with those losers! My friends will question me!" Jessica hissed at Alex's ear, keeping her voice low.

"Well, Jess, you've been calling me a loser my whole life, and have only stopped two weeks ago," Alex droned.

"Why can't we just go together, just the two of us?" Jessica moved in closer, if that was possible. Her eyes narrowed. Her lips parted as she gazed hungrily at Alex's lips.

Alex stared back at Jessica, amused by her audacity. The woman wasn't even subtle, or care to be anymore. Whatever happened to Richard, Jessica's boyfriend, Alex hadn't heard her mention him again since that night.

"We can't leave at night. No ferry," Alex stated matter-of-factly. Nicky earned extra money for being the only transportation mean available in Litchfield other than the ferry. There used to be some flyers around, but the people with those abilities were usually harmless, and they could leave the island much faster.

"My room then," Jessica suggested.

Alex chuckled. Jessica was real hungry. "Don't you North people have roommates?"

"Yours?" Jessica breathed. "You got your room now, don't you?"

"Don't think you can stand the room in the South. All the smell and stuff."

Jessica made a face. "You don't want me." Her accusing tone had Alex's full attention.

"Of course, I do." Alex lightly groaned. She hadn't had sex for over three months, stressed out over the escape plans for both her mother and herself. The money transfers she had to make. Planning and finding a safe place for Diane. Trying not to get her boss suspicious, or getting herself killed too soon. Alex had finally found a bit of peaceful time now, and she was horny as hell. "But I don't want you to come to my room and then start complaining, Jess. That'd be such a big turn off."

"I'll shut up, I promise. Tonight?" Jessica edged closer to the taller woman again, and their faces nearly brushed.

"Next!"

Both Alex and Jessica flinched at the shout. Alex then stepped up pass the red line taped on the gym floor, a sort of safety line. She stood about twenty meters from the rusty robot. Number 48 was painted on its left chest alongside the name, 'Falcon'.

Falcon raised his left hand, and Alex readily shot a small bolt of lightning at his red-painted palm. It was to demonstrate her controls and gauges over her powers. How precise her hits were. How hard it had hit. Alex had done it numerous time before.

Then Falcon started the second phrase to test the lightning striker's endurance. To her own disappointment, Alex began to miss targets the longer she spent her powers. Her strength declined only fifteen minutes in, a result from her injuries and the continual lack of sleep. She was slightly out of breath, and failed to keep up with Falcon's rapid body movements. Instead of hitting the target on his chest, she sent a blue bolt at his head. The shot proved to be way too strong, causing Falcon's head to snap. The robot froze, stuttered, and then shut down.

"Enough for today, Vause. 56 out of 100. Come in again tomorrow," Bennett said, holding a chart in his hand.

"56? Are you fucking kidding me?" Alex wiped the sweat sheen off her forehead with the back of her hand. She knew that she had been slacking off in powers-control practices during the past few years, largely due to a love life problem, which she could never quite know how to solve. But the score was simply humiliating for an old resident like her.

Bennett dutifully reread the chart. "86 hits, 105 missed. Your speed was at 72.5%, which was not bad, considering your health. Your score was drastically cut due to your last hit at Falcon's face, causing him to malfunction. If he were a real, actual human, his face would have been blown out completely." He cleared his throat. "But we all know that you've been exhausted. Don't take it personally."

At Jessica's giggle, Alex turned to glare at her. Jessica could never quite drop their childhood antics, Alex being the butt of the joke as usual.

Jessica moved besides Alex, their shoulders brushing. "I'll show you how it's done... tonight," she whispered, her voice thick with desires.

Alex smirked and walked off the line.

* * *

><p>"Concentrate!"<p>

Red's scold pulled Piper's attention back to the task at hand. She looked away from the thick, fiberglass windows, which revealed the vast assembly of Gym 1. Piper and Red were occupying a smaller room, separated from everyone else. It was her first day back at trainings.

"I'm sorry. I'll try again." Piper's gaze fell to the floor, where several hundreds of empty, tin cans were scattered around Red's feet. Her mind had wandered off, and those cans must have hit the instructor. Red was glaring at her, and rightly so.

Her left arm still cast, Piper was in a gray hoodie and a pair of sweaty pants. She was standing in the middle of the room, staring down at the cans with full concentration. Slowly and carefully, those cans began to gather, roll up to their standing positions, and form up to a six-row wall of cans. Neatly. Just as Red had instructed.

Red nodded approvingly. "Good."

Piper smiled in relief. Sometimes moving a small object could be more frustrating than moving a cruise liner. But what appeared to frustrate her most easily had proven to be a certain brunette amidst the Gym 1 crowd.

_Why is Alex here...? And Wedge!?_ Piper swore under her breath at the thought of how close the two women were standing together.

"When will I get to train with other people?" Piper asked as she continued to the next stage. The wall of cans began to lift off the ground, steadily at first, but a few eventually slipped and fell. Piper flinched at the mistake, and the wall descended fast at her loss of concentration.

"Don't stop. Keep going," Red commanded calmly.

The wobbly wall stopped just a few inches above the ground, several more cans falling off. The clinks resonated the word 'mistake' ten times louder than Piper would have liked.

"Don't pick them up just yet. You're doing fine. Don't stop. Concentrate on the bigger picture," Red continued.

Piper nodded as she carefully moved the wall of cans to other side of the room. "When… when will I get to train with the others?" She repeated the question.

"When you learn to concentrate on your powers instead of your girlfriend."

Piper froze, and half of the wall fell tumbling to the ground. She gulped. Now she was just holding the remaining of the wall in midair, not daring to even move it. "She is not my girlfriend."

Red sighed. "You did not honor your words to us. There has been no progress on your part."

"You've been spying on me?" Piper frowned. "Well, I… I just need some times to, you know, let things go back to normal for a bit, or she might get suspicious." She glanced out the window again, watching Alex testing her powers against the robot. "Why is she here already? She still looks ill... Yeah, I heard that she got a room in the South now. But why is Wedge here? Why is she here? I mean, aren't these trainings are for newbies? She must—"

Red scratched her chin, lazily watching Piper watch Alex. "If you are so determined to glance at her only from the distance, then maybe I should acquire Wedge as our spy instead."

"I know." Piper snapped. She turned her attention back to the floating cans. "I'm working on it."

* * *

><p>Larry sat edgily at the dining table, glancing at Howard as he was having a bowl of soup. Amy went about between the kitchen and the table, serving them foods. His father had been very busy the past week, and Larry only had the chance to catch him now.<p>

"Aren't you going to say something? I have only half an hour before I take off again," Howard said, holding the soup spoon in one hand.

Larry nodded. "Yeah, you're right. Yeah, I should probably get to it. I, uh… we… umm… I'm getting married. I'm marrying Piper." His parents stopped whatever they were doing, and just stared at him. "That's the longest time you both have been silent."

"What's the hurry? She's still in training. Not only that she hasn't made much progress on her powers control, she's just got into trouble one after another. I know that it isn't all her fault, but the truth is that it's an insane life for 'gifted' people. She needs time."

"I—I know, dad. But, I mean, can you let her come home for a day, so we can get married? Then she can go back to Litchfield for more trainings. Just one day. That's all we need." Larry smiled nervously.

Amy glanced worriedly at her husband, and then smiled at her son. "Why, Larry? She's likely to stay in Litchfield for a year or more. For our—her safety. Everyone's safety. Lord knows she might not be the same person anymore when she gets out. Don't you want to wait and see if you're still compatible by then?"

"A—a year or more?" Larry frowned at his father. "You told me that it was going to take half a year at best."

"I never said that for her case. I said that some people had gone through the trainings and completed their requirements in just a few months. I was, and still am, convinced that, in Piper's case, it will take quite a while," Howard explained.

Larry felt his cheeks hot. He got up from his chair, clenching his fists. "You can't do this to her. She's not a criminal. You have to let her out."

"She isn't incarcerated, Larry. She willingly submitted herself to Litchfield's trainings, and rules are rules. She almost got her brother killed, son. She knew that she needed help, and you know that, too." Howard put his spoon down, and clasped his hands across his stomach as he leaned back in his chair. "What's troubling you? What happened?"

Larry sighed as he reluctantly took the seat again. "It's… I don't know what it is, but It's been only a month, and she already seems… distant."

"What makes you think so?"

Larry looked away from his father's scrutinizing gaze. "Well, uh… she forgot to call sometimes, and… and she didn't seem to be very enthusiastic when I proposed to get married as soon as possible. It seemed almost like that she didn't want to… that she didn't want to leave the island. Like she's forgetting her life outside of Litchfield."

"It's a hard life for gifted people, Larry. She needs time to adjust—"

"I don't think that was it. I feel like—like she's been distracted. I think that... maybe she's met someone new." Larry sternly gestured at nothing in particular. "She calls me twice a day, but sometimes it feels like she wasn't really there. Her attention waned really fast. I'm losing her. Fuck, I'm losing her, dad."

"I can imagine that it's been tough for her since Alex Vause has recently returned to Litchfield as well. Piper is still new to all of this, and having Vause around her doesn't really help—"

"Wait. Wait, what? Vause? You mean 'Alex Vause'? What—no. Why didn't Piper tell me?" Larry's voice was slightly shaken, overwhelmed by anger and fears. "Why is she there? Wasn't she the one who deliberately triggered Piper's powers? You said she worked for the bad guys. Why didn't you arrest her, and…" He stopped take a deep breath in. "I don't know, send her to a government division or something? Put her away. Just put her away. Why did you shelter her, not to mention letting her hang around Piper?" He growled in frustration, clenching his fists.

"There are things that you may not understand about our kind. We're different. A rare minority. We can't afford to have too many enemies. We must forgive or forget when we can."

Larry felt his blood boil. "Forgive? After what she did to Piper? She endangered Piper's life! She's a very dangerous woman!"

"So is Piper." Larry halted at the words, and the old man sighed. "I think that Piper is learning of that fact too. It's a very lonely world for people like us."

"But you still have Ma. You have me. You can have a normal family. Piper can be just like you. She has to remember that," Larry said, trying his best to keep his voice steady. He just watched as Howard looked away in silence.

_Lies._

So many years of lies that his father had kept from his family. Could it be different for Piper and him? He somehow dreaded what was waiting ahead of their future. Would Piper be the same girl he once knew? Would she lie to him like his father did? But she did lie, didn't she? She had kept her powers secret for years before Cal incident.

_More lies._

Larry eventually looked away, and there were no more words exchanged between them.

* * *

><p>Piper shifted on her bed, trying to find a more comfortable pose. It was almost midnight, but she was wide awake. She'd been calling Larry a few times today, but he didn't pick up the phone. She couldn't help but worry if something terrible had happened. She couldn't reach Howard either. The man wasn't in Litchfield today.<p>

_Did I say something wrong? Did I upset him somehow?_

The thought of the proposal came across her mind. Larry had sounded very serious, and was skeptical when she didn't seem to be equally enthusiastic about it. She wouldn't know what had gotten into her. A stable life with him was what she wanted, but for some reason Litchfield had started to become fast her second home. A new life she had never thought that she would be leading, and somehow what was outside of Litchfield started to feel 'detached'. She was scared of what she would become, but she knew that it was inevitable.

Piper lied flat on her back again, puffing out a breath as her mind still processed wildly. For all the reasons that she knew she should not feel, she was glad to have Alex around. At least there was a familiar face she could turn to on this strange island.

_No. No, Alex is… she's a wrong idea. Wrong. Just wrong…_

Piper held her breath as the thought rushed through her mind over and over again. But it was Alex. It was her firm, yet gentle embraces. Her careless smirks. Her sometimes warm, even shy, reluctant smiles. Her contemplative, piercing gazes, and her husky, needy whispers. Alex was everything Piper had wanted, and it destroyed her inside to realize how wrong of a choice Alex was.

_Fuck…_

Before Piper could stop herself, she quietly got out of bed. She put on a black coat over her silky, blue nightgown. She slipped out of the room, careful not to wake her roommate. Across the vast yards, she headed towards the South. She knew that Healy had banned her from entering the South, but hopefully no one would notice her in the dark at this late hour into the night. Nicky had told her about Alex's room, and Piper moved around to the back of the building, heading to the designated room. There it was, the room was on the second floor, third window from the right. It was dimly lit with possibly just a desk lamp. Its curtains were pulled down, leaving a gap to reveal some space inside.

_She's still awake._

Piper bent down and grabbed a gravel off the ground. She straightened up again, arching her right arm for a throw. But she froze upon seeing two figures moving about inside the room. Their bodies pressed, their hands roaming over each other's faces, shoulders and backs. Their lips connected, then parted in a breathy rush, and connected again in a heated clash. Slender hands moved through the wavy, blonde locks. Those slim shoulders. That shadowed face. Piper knew who Alex was kissing, having and holding instead of her tonight. It shouldn't have mattered anymore after all these years, but it still stalled Piper somehow. The gravel sat still in her cold palm. Remarkably, she hadn't thrown it at the window, interrupting whatever that was going on in that room. She hadn't the time to process what she wanted to believe—to feel. She hadn't the strength to look away.

_Loss._

All Piper saw was the wrong choice she would have made if she had stayed with Alex. It would be the loss of a perfect life that she could have with Larry. She should feel relieved now. She should be glad that she had made the right choice. Yet she was still reluctant to marry him. She wondered why. She knew that it would hurt to know, yet it would hurt not knowing either. Defeated with her inability to come up with a satisfying answer, she let the gravel slip from her grasp, and quietly walked away.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Piper was lying on her bed, the back of her right hand over her forehead. She had been staring at the ceiling for hours on end. She had tried to fall asleep, but every time she was at the edge of slumber, images of Alex with Jessica kept pulling her back. It was tormenting enough to have to witness it with her own eyes, and the fact that Alex had kissed her back that night in the infirmary had probably meant nothing. She knew that she had been acting distant with Alex, cold even, and that it was unfair to expect anything more from Alex. But a part of her couldn't help but wonder if Alex had easily moved on (just like last night) after their breakup four years ago. Even though Piper had been the one to leave, she had been a wreck, and had only hidden her heartbreak through various rebounds.

Piper tore her gaze from the white plane, and looked out the window. Soft pool of morning light permeated into the room through the gap between the curtains. She stared, trying to find solace in the brightness outside. She let out a tired sigh, trying to make amends with her battered mind. She was exhausted. She felt like she had been at the end of a long, resentful road for quite some time now, and Litchfield had presented itself as the new path for her. Perhaps she should stop mulling over the past and look to the future now.

"Haven't slept?"

Piper flinched, and turned to her roommate. "Hey..."

Polly yawned, but with a smile on her face. "I heard you left last night. But you returned quickly. Didn't look too pleased."

Piper's eyes widened. "Wow, you saw a lot in the dark."

Polly got up to lean back down on her elbows, her brown head messy. "They say love blinds you, but the others can see clearly."

Piper had to smile back at her roommate. "I think I can see pretty clearly now."

* * *

><p>Lying on her side, Piper watched Alex moan a little in her sleep. Blue gaze trailed along the sleeping woman's full lips down to her neck, to the alabaster skin of her bare shoulder and chest. It was their usual morning with Piper waking up first, watching the taller woman sleep.<p>

Smiling, Piper softly brushed Alex's hair off the woman's face. They had been together for almost a year now, but she never got tired of looking at Alex. Of course, Alex oozed raw sexuality and excitement. She thrilled Piper. The sex was amazing, filled with passion. The trips, parties and dinners were extravagant. But it had become something more than superficial interests for Piper. Stripped away the carnal desires and adventures abroad, Piper would no less cherish the quiet, mundane moments in the apartment with Alex, in their old, comfy clothes, their hair messy, their faces without makeup. She would get up first and get their breakfasts. Alex would later clean up, tidying their place. Piper would play games, and Alex would catch up on her books. Like how they both knew that it was 2 sugars for Alex, 3 for Piper. How Alex would know which pieces of Piper's clothes to wash first and on what occasions her blonde girlfriend would like to wear them. Alex might have a wild, mysterious impression, but she had always surprised Piper with her attention to details. She always made Piper feel loved and cared for. It all felt so natural to Piper somehow as if it was meant to be. The fact that she could feel such contentment with the simplest things, being able to completely share her life with someone else did startle her. It simply scared her; Piper knew then that she had fallen so deeply in love like she never had before.

Alex was stirred, groaning as she turned to the other side. Piper knew that it was time to get up and get breakfast for them both. She kicked the blanket and shot out of bed. She went for a quick shower, put on her clothes and pulled her hair up into a loose bun. She made a short trip to 'Queens Comfort' six blocks away to get their brunches.

"Hey, Piper!" Leanne, the pimply-faced waitress, greeted her. "The usual?"

"Yes, please." Piper stood by the counter, smiling widely. Her blue eyes deep and vibrant. Her smile as bright as the sun.

Leanne shouted out the orders at the back door, and came out to the counter again. She eyed Piper up and down. "You and Vause seem pretty serious. It's been months."

"Almost a year now." Piper tucked a few strands of hair behind her ear. She blushed that someone had taken notice. But then she wasn't so sure about the hint at Alex's previous relationships. She had asked, but never gotten full details out of her girlfriend. From what she had gathered, Alex had never been committed before her.

"A year!? You really are something! She's definitely into you! What's your secrets?" Leanne giggled. "Other girls never lasted more than a month or two. You know how Vause is."

Piper paused. "Umm, no, I don't. She rarely mentioned it."

"Vause has dated tons of girls! But why not, right? Look at her." Leanne then bent over across the counter, whispering, "But sometimes people say that it's part of her job."

Piper raised a brow. "Her job?"

"Yeah, that mysterious, dusky gentleman is supposed to be her boss or something, right? What's his name again? They say that he tells her who to go with. Nobody knows what for, or why. Are you one of those girls?" Leanne giggled again. "I guess not. It's been a year, so you must have been the real thing!"

_Fahri_.

Piper felt her body go cold. What the hell was that about? Was it some sort of business? A scheme? As crazy as it sounded, Piper had noticed a bizarre relationship between Alex and Fahri. There was just something Piper could never put a finger on it. Perhaps it was Alex's unquestioned trust in him; how he had absolute control over her. It was unsettling to see 'Alex Vause' in such a vulnerable position, but Piper wasn't sure if Alex realized how defenseless she truly was. _The other girls...? _Piper's heart grew heavy as grim thoughts roamed through her mind.

After twenty-five minutes wait, the meals were packed in white paper bags, ready. Piper paid in cash, took the foods and left. Her walk back to the apartment felt like hours, her ankles feeling like cuffed with lead. She knew that she shouldn't believe a mere stranger's words over her girlfriend's, but all things concerning Fahri had begun to outweigh Alex's 'I love you'. Alex would leave at ungodly hours as soon as Fahri called, and never bothered explaining why, expecting Piper to just be understanding and forget about it. Alex had begun to leave on trips without taking Piper with her, and never bothered explaining. Piper had been told that it was just 'part of the job'. Piper had complied so far, because she loved Alex, fearing that her incessant inquisitions would bore her lover. But now that a stranger like Leanne had remarked about her true status with Alex Vause, the doubts she had had started to flood her mind.

"I'm back," Piper announced as she opened the door to their apartment. She walked in, closed the door and kicked off her shoes. She made her way to the kitchen counter and put the food bags on it. Leaning over the counter, she could see Alex moving across the bed, naked, pushing the blanket off her. The phone in her hand, Alex hadn't acknowledged Piper's presence, but talked for a bit longer and then hung up. Alex punched in a few buttons and carelessly tossed the phone onto the bed before walking into the bathroom.

When Piper heard the shower running, she made her way to the bed, and picked up Alex's phone. She logged in and checked the call log, but halted at the empty screen. Slowly, she put the phone back on the bed, and turned to watch the shadowy figure in the shower behind the tinted glass door. Endless questions began to overwhelm her. After a year together, there was still no telling just how real Alex was to her-how real they were to each other.

* * *

><p>Alex groaned as her heavy eyelids slid open. Bright pool of light streamed through the gap between the curtains. She squinted as she fumbled for her glasses on the desk next to the bed. Naked, she pulled the blanket up from her waist to her chest. It was quite cold in the morning.<p>

"Ow..." Alex grumbled at the scratches Jessica had left last night. The blonde's thirst was insatiable, although it had more than made up for Alex's few months of sexual frustrations. She was sore all over, her wounds still somewhat tender, and Jessica hadn't been gentle at all. She just hoped that they hadn't made too much noises to disturb the rooms adjacent to hers.

"Vause! Wake up...! Vause, it's almost nine!"

Alex frowned at the knocks on the door. It was Nicky. "Yeah... yeah, I'm up!" She put on her crumpled shirt from last night, and sighed. Fortunately Jessica had already left, presumably in the early morning hour.

* * *

><p>After finishing her morning business, Alex left the South with Nicky. They both were in training jumpsuits, heading out to the Study. They were supposed to have a small birthday party for Tricia. Stalking across the yard together, they looked at the group of residents playing soccer.<p>

"So how was last night?" Nicky nudged Alex with her elbow.

Alex shrugged. "It sucks to eat alone."

"Oh, come on. Morello dropped by your room before going to bed, and she said that she heard noises. Wedge or Chapman?"

"Lorna checked up on me? You guys think I'm six years old or something?" Alex rolled her eyes.

"Some other chick? Sister Ingall?"

Alex chortled. "Shut up."

"We check on you, because you've just moved back. A lot of current residents don't know who you are. And you've just got into troubles. Serious ones, too. You brought in an enemy from the outside. I wouldn't be surprised at all if some would try anything to get you out of Litchfield, dead or alive."

Alex nodded. "I'm aware of the possibility."

"So who was it? Wedge, right?" Nicky grinned. "I can't believe that bitch—ouch!" She yelped in pain, pressing her palm to her left cheek, where it had been hit by the soccer ball. A soccer player shouted out an apology as he ran to retrieve the ball.

"Oh, not this fucker." Nicky cursed as she teleported herself to the ball, and kicked it hard before the tall man could grasp it. The ball volleyed, and the man looked up, frowning in confusion. Arms across her chest, Nicky raised her brows mockingly as if to challenge him.

"I already said, 'sorry'. That wasn't necessary," Christopher said through his gritted teeth.

"Nicky," Alex called out for her friend, her gaze weary. She didn't like where this was going.

Nicky glowered at Christopher. "Apology not accepted."

Alex watched in horror as Nicky used her powers to deliver surprise attacks at Christopher, who seemed powerless to evade the punches. His friends started yelling and ran towards them. From the look on those people's faces, surely they were not coming to stop the fight, but joining.

"Nicky! Let's go!" Alex looked left and right as her feisty friend whooshed from one spot to another. "Nicky, they're coming—ah!" Suddenly Alex swayed, and dropped to her knees, tightly clutching her arms. Sharp, nasty chills ran down her spine, and pain began to bite every inch of her skin. She trembled uncontrollably, her quivering lips turning purple. It felt as though her life energy had been depleted at an alarming rate. She could barely move a muscle now.

Nicky had stopped teleporting, simply disappeared. Christopher now took a moment to breathe, glaring down at Alex. Seeing the anger in his eyes, Alex knew that it was him who emanated the deadly air, effectively crippling her. It must have meant for Nicky, but it would have affected anyone within his proximity.

Curled up on the ground, Alex watched as his friends approached. _Fuck. I'm so fucked._

Snarling, they grabbed and pulled Alex up by the collar. A knuckle landed at her right cheek, sending her glasses off. She could hear the cracks as one of the guys must have stepped on them in the chaos. Rough, angry hands kept pulling her, while a hand snaked up to her neck and strangled her. She couldn't see who was doing what now, but it didn't really matter. She would be expelled if she used her powers outside of trainings, but there was no stopping. They were going to seriously harm her, or worse, kill her. Out of panic, electric blue currents flashed a few times at her fingertips. The men instantly shouted out warnings to one another. Some had quickly stepping away from Alex, but a few others were still relentless, kicking at her. Before she could stop herself, bolts of lightning shot out of her hands. However, the men were forcibly swept off their feet. They rolled onto the ground like useless logs before the lightning bolts could strike them. Confused, Alex looked up and saw a blonde-haired figure running towards her. Her vision was blurry, but she could tell who it was by a mile away.

"Alex!" Piper ran across the yard and came to kneel by Alex's side. "Alex, are you all right!? What's going on here—ah…! What the—" Piper suddenly stalled as her breath was caught in her throat. Shivering, she rubbed one hand over her arm, her nails digging into her skin.

Sitting up, Alex turned to look at Christopher, noting that he had already gotten up from the ground. Rage erupted within her, realizing what he was doing. Fiery heat grew on her fists, blue licking up her arms. The bolt of lightning blasted down at Christopher, but missed when he was yet again propelled to the side, the lightning strike leaving deep trenches in the ground where he had just been.

Alex turned to snarl at Piper. "What are you doing!? He hurt you!"

"… can't... let you do that. Red… won't let you get away with it. They'll… put you back... in the SHU…" Piper hugged herself. Her face was drained of all colors, her lips pale and her eyes bloodshot.

From the corner of her eyes, Alex could tell that several of the men were already up to their feet, stampeding towards Piper and her. It was going to get nasty, and all she could think of was to get up. She pushed herself up and threw herself over Piper, using her body to shield the woman from the incoming attacks. She shut her eyes tightly, her jaws clamped. She expected a lot of pain, but instead felt a strong breeze around her. She held on tightly to the body next to her, her mind temporarily failing to register what was going on. For a moment that felt like a rushed, tiring dream, she opened her eyes again to find herself in the deep woods. Everything around her was green, thick and wet. Everything but the body beneath her. Quickly she rolled off Piper, giving the blonde some room to breathe.

"Nicky?" Alex groggily say sat up. Her friend must have been the only answer as to why they ended up in the woods, when they were still in the yard just a moment ago.

Nicky appeared next to Alex, offering the taller woman the broken pair of glasses. "Here. God, you look like shit. Can't you take care of yourself for just one minute without me?"

Alex snatched the glasses from Nicky, and put them on. Its left leg was crooked. Cracks and scratches marred the left lens. She would need a new pair of glasses ASAP. "Fuck you, Nicky. You almost got me killed! What were you thinking? That guy already said, 'sorry'."

Nicky spat. "He hasn't... to Morello."

"Jesus, Lorna's love life is her concern. We all know that she's gonna go back to him again by the end of the week. And it's not entirely his fault that this keeps happening."

"Don't be such an ass, Vause. It's my concern too! Whether we're dating or not, Morello is my friend. I have to look out for her! Just like Chapman here. She intervened before they kicked your butt." Nicky scoffed. "Well, actually, they did."

"Fuck you," Alex grunted, wincing as she lightly touched her right cheek.

"Will... you two... stop already?" Piper slowly sat up, a hand clutching at her chest. She was out of breath. Clearly she had never been subjected to Nicky's nauseous teleporting skills. "I think… this…"

"Don't worry, blondie. You'll feel better in a bit. Just take a deep breath. Everything's gonna be fine." Arms across her chest, Nicky had a smug smile on her face.

Alex got up, but inwardly winced. _Great_. The pains were back, hammering against her ribs threefold. Just when she thought that she was getting better. Unfortunately, for Alex Vause, not a day went by in Litchfield that was uneventful. But Alex ignored the pain and extended a hand to Piper. The blonde glanced up, and after a moment of silence, she took Alex's hand and let Alex pull her up.

Piper felt bile rising up her throat, her breakfast in the mix. Her legs wobbled, and she fell against Alex's taller frame for support. Alex's long arms wrapped around her in an instant to prevent her from falling.

"Are you ok, Pipes?" Alex watched Piper with worry, and then turned to Nicky. "Take her to the infirmary. This looks serious."

"It must have been the combination of my motion sickness-induced powers and Christopher's dead air shit. Can you believe anyone want to be near him?" Nicky made a face. "Like when he panicked, he could hurt you just like that. I wonder if he ever slipped during fucking. That must have been horrible for his partners."

Alex rolled her eyes. "You can ask Lorna about it later. Now help Piper to the infirmary."

Nicky smirked. "Nah, I got a party to go to," she said, turning away.

"Yeah, Tricia's birthday lunch. Take us back now." Alex tightened her grips on Piper's slender arms as she felt Piper's legs caving in again. "Pipes, are you ok? You wanna sit down?"

Alex heard Nicky chuckling, but when she looked up, the small woman was already gone. "Nicky... Nicky, come on... Nicky…?" Alex gulped when there was no response. Piper's head was resting against her neck as Alex now needed to hold the blonde with both arms to keep her unconscious form on her feet. "Fuck."

* * *

><p>Piper opened her eyes again to see the tall, layered roofs of thick green leaves. Lying flat on her back, she could feel the dampness from the soil seeping through the back of her gray, hooded sweatshirt. Comfortable in her pose, she sleepily smiled up at the bright, blue sky. She only realized where she was when she felt her 'pillow' moving. She glanced up and saw Alex smiling down at her.<p>

"Feeling better?"

It was that husky whisper again that rendered Piper helpless, mesmerized under the piercing green gaze. It took Piper a moment to realize that she was resting her head on Alex's lap. It took her a second to remember what had happened earlier today—what happened last night. At the last thought, she instantly sat up, looking away. "Where did Nicky go?"

"Tricia's birthday lunch. I was supposed to be there too."

Piper kept her gaze anywhere but Alex. She stood up, hands on her hips. She must have passed out somehow. "Are you blaming me for missing the party?"

Alex stopped for a second. "No, I didn't mean for it to sound—"

"How long was I out?"

"Almost four hours. It 1 pm. already."

"Four hours!?" Piper's eyes widened. But then again she shouldn't be so shocked since she had absolutely no sleep last night.

Alex shrugged. "It happens. It depends on the person's mental and bodily strength."

"Are you saying that I'm weak?" The younger woman glared.

"Whoa, Pipes, why are you so defensive all of a sudden?" Alex frowned, lifting her glasses up to rest on top of her head.

Piper paused at the clearer view of the vibrant green eyes. A simple stare from Alex could easily render her speechless.

"I guess it was your first time encountering a wicked power like that. It helps when you get to fight them more often."

Piper recalled the short moment Christopher's powers had affected on Alex. "You fought one before? How did you deal with them?"

"Kill them." Piper halted, and Alex just laughed. She got up, brushing the dirt off her jumpsuit. She limped a little as she began to walk off. "You seem fine now. Let's head back, shall we?"

Piper followed the brunette, noting Alex's awkward gait. It seemed that her legs weren't fully willing. Alex must have been sitting in the same position for hours to let Piper's head rest. She watched Alex's back, wanting to say something, but decided against it.

For what seemed like twenty minutes of silence, they both trekked along the narrow path, pushing away the large leaves as they passed. Soon, they reached the wider, graveled road.

"Thanks... for saving me today." Alex was the first to break the silence. "But next time, don't interfere. You could have gotten seriously hurt."

"Shut up, Al. They were going to kill you." Piper put her fists in her hoodie's pockets. Still looking away, she picked up her pace a bit to walk alongside Alex. She didn't like when Alex sounded vulnerable. It just sounded so wrong. "Are you hurt?" Piper regretted as soon as the stupid question slipped through her lips. Of course, it hurt. It hurt just to witness it. The people of Litchfield were wild, unpredictable and violent. It seemed as though their powers were ready to explode—to be spent at any given moment. Sometimes Piper couldn't help but feel that it was for the better that the 'gifted' people should remain on this island. They would be feared and despised out there.

Alex didn't respond, but just stared ahead. Her face was neutral, making it impossible for Piper to read. In the very least her walk had become normal now. Her back was a little straighter when she walked.

"Do you think they'll try to ambush us when we get back?" Piper was worried not for her own safety; she was able to defend herself pretty much without getting into trouble. But she feared for Alex since Red was looking for any excuse to incarcerate her.

"I wouldn't worry about me, but you should watch out for yourself. Those guys live in the North. They'll seek some sort of retribution."

"I'm not afraid. I'm very capable of kicking their asses," Piper said, perking her chin up.

Alex looked grim, biting her bottom lip. "I don't think your roommate will be much help to you. She's a Parkslope wuss. I'll ask Jess. She's friend with Christopher. I'm sure she can—"

"'Jess' as in 'Jessica Wedge', your girlfriend?" Piper grew cold, her body stiffened.

Alex paused for a second before a smirk crept up her face. "Who told you that? Nicky...? No, we're old friends—"

"I certainly don't need her help. I can take care of myself." Piper walked faster, leaving Alex a few feet behind as if the further away she was from Alex, the memories of last night would become more distant. But in truth it was nothing like she had hoped. She could still see clearly how Jessica pressed in against Alex, both pulling and pushing the other down to bed. Piper couldn't see beyond the window frame, but it was more than enough to leave her troubled and painfully sleepless last night.

Alex rushed to Piper's side. "You need an ally in the North. Holly isn't going to cut it."

"It's 'Polly'. Talk to me again when you care to remember people's names. You and Nicky are unbelievable," Piper said, rolling her eyes. She tried her best to keep a straight face, but she wouldn't know for how long. She picked up her speed again, needing to get away. She didn't think that she could stand one more second looking at Alex. It was intoxicating just to be around this woman. Sometimes Piper still couldn't believe how she was able to leave Alex that night four years ago. Sometimes she missed 'them' so much, and a lot of times she just despised all that they once had.

But Alex heatedly grabbed Piper's cast arm, pulling her back. Piper winced, and Alex immediately let go off her. "Oh, God, I'm so sorry! I didn't see—"

"Forget it." Piper just turned away.

Alex followed suit. "Look, it's for your own safety."

"I said, 'forget it'!" Piper spoke a little too loudly for her own liking, and it frustrated her that she couldn't keep her emotions in check.

Alex grabbed Piper's shoulder and pulled them both to a halt. "Are you even listening at all!? No one can survive in Litchfield alone. You need friends who could protect you, or fight with you. You might have Howard as a—a family, which is great, but he's not here very often. A lot of times horrible things in Litchfield just got buried, forgotten like they never happened. We're like one, big, fucked up family here, Pipes. Rules can only do so much when you deal with superpowers. It's nothing like the world out there, and Howard isn't going to be there every time you need him. I… I can't..." Alex began to stutter, seemingly disconcerted by heavy thoughts. "I just don't wanna think that if… if something happens to you..."

Piper cursed herself as she gazed up and studied the intense green eyes, wanting so much to whisper calm words to reassure the taller woman that everything was going to be all right. Alex sounded desperate in her worries, and it hurt Piper even more that it seemed to be all she could get from Alex now. They were so close, yet so far away. "I want you to think. Think of it whenever you can. Every fucking moment, I want you to never forget. I don't want a day gone by that you wouldn't think of me."

Alex froze, staring at Piper. She looked utterly stunned by what was said. Piper, too, was surprised by what had just slipped out of her mouth.

After a few moments, Alex took a deep breath in. "God, Pipes, I'm getting whiplash here."

Piper adamantly nodded, feeling guilty herself for bringing it up. "Never mind. Forget what I said." She found her voice shaken, so she decided to shut up.

"All right. But can we get back to convincing you that Jess, while she might not be very friendly, she's harmless, I'm sure. She's powerful enough to keep you safe. She can talk to them to leave you alone. I won't be able to sleep at night if you—"

"We'd be even then, just like how I couldn't sleep last night after seeing you with her."

For a few moments, Alex looked dumbfounded. "What...? You saw us?"

"Fuck. It doesn't matter. What am I saying? We don't matter." Piper momentarily put her right hand over her forehead, sighing. What a day it had been. Every fucking word that had come out of her mouth was regrettable. She just took every wrong turn whenever she was with Alex, yet somehow she couldn't walk away.

Alex groaned in disbelief. "Pipes, you kissed me, and then avoided me like plague the next day. Look, I tried to understand where you were coming from. You were lonely, and you slipped. We're history, I get it. But you don't get to make me feel guilty for seeing someone else. You don't get to break my heart twice."

"_I_ broke your heart? I fucking broke your heart!?" Piper felt blood shooting to her head. She pushed Alex's chest with both hands. "You used me, Alex! All through the time we were together, I was just another recruit to you. You were so full of shit! Everything you did or said was one lie after another! You followed their orders and put my life in danger. Yeah, I broke your fucking heart." Piper scoffed.

Alex took a step back, looking down. "Not everything was a lie," she mumbled. "Yes, you were on their list, and that was how I first approached you. But I never lied when I said—"

"_I love you_? Don't bother. That gets old after a while—" Piper stopped herself. Her heart grew heavy, and just when she thought she was so over it, it still fucking hurt. "God, I don't even know why we're having this conversation. Fuck. Let's just... let's go back now. I don't want to miss the trainings."

Alex looked heartbroken, and Piper didn't know why. She just couldn't bear to see it. Even though Alex had always been the dominant one in their relationship, it had always been Piper who had made the most difficult decisions for them.

"I'm asking Howard for a day off, so I can leave to get married. I'm just waiting for his permission. He's been busy, but I'm sure he'll come around and settle this matter soon." Piper lied. She hadn't approached Howard about the matter, leaving it to Larry to take care of it. And Larry hadn't answered her calls for two days in a row now. Piper kept staring at the ground, while Alex had remained silent. "The best I can do is... is to be your friend. I think I can do that."

A long moment passed before Alex spoke again. This time she sounded steady, the calm returning to her deep voice. "Sure. Friends are good. That's quite generous of you when I think about what I did. I'll take what I can."

Piper looked up at Alex. It somehow left a hollow feeling in her chest at how easily Alex resigned. Just how many times they had to go through the push and pull, the wants and the hates—the fulfillments and regrets.

"So you'll let me talk to Jess about this? At least, let me do this. I can't let those guys hurt you."

"Al." Piper briefly closed her eyes. It was eating her up inside, and she had to get it out. "Can you please not care this much? It makes it even harder for me. You... Seeing you again after all these years is probably the hardest thing for me in Litchfield. Please, don't do this."

Alex lightly scoffed. "Why? Are you saying that it's because you still love me...? _You_ left me." Alex sounded jaded as she reminded Piper. By this point, she had lost that fire in her voice. She tiredly ran her hand through her hair. "I don't wanna go through it again either. You left me to die, and then you went and started a new, wonderful life. You have someone waiting for you out there now. Hey, that's great. Good for you. But, for years, I've just felt dead, Pipes. I lost you, and then I lost everything I'd ever believed in, even myself. You have no idea how much it destroyed me. So, yeah, I wouldn't care so much just to make it easier for both of us, if I can help it."

Alex sharply turned and made her way down the hill. There it was, the answer Piper had been asking throughout those tormented years, but she could only watch Alex walk away now. She lied in bed this morning, thinking that she had seen things clearly for the first time in years, but now found herself even more confused. Lost along this long road in the middle of nowhere, her mind wondered endlessly of what could have been different if they had met in other circumstances—if they still had the chance to make it 'real'.


End file.
